EP101 The Mantra To End All Mantras

If you are comparing yourself to every pregnant woman you see, freaking out over how long you’ve been on your journey, or are losing faith in your baby ever getting here, I am going to teach you a SIX word mantra that can keep you focused on the truth. You were meant to be a Mom!

Hey Gorgeous, if you want success on your fertility journey, you’ve got to have the mindset for it. It’s time to kick fear, negativity, doubt, shame, jealousy, and the whole clown car of low vibe fertility journey BS to the curb. I’m your host, Roseanne Austin, Fertility Mindset Master. Former prosecutor and recovering type A control freak perfectionist.

I use the power of mindset to get pregnant naturally and have my baby boy at 43, despite years of fertility treatment failure. I help women across the globe beat the odds on their fertility journey, just like I did. Get ready for a quick hit of confidence, joy, feminine badassery, and loads of hell yes for your fertility journey.

It’s time to get fearless baby, fearlessly fertile. Let’s do this. Welcome to the Fearlessly Fertile Podcast, Episode 101, The Mantra to End All Mantras. Hey loves, I am so excited to be here with you this week. And, oh, I gotta tell ya, this week’s episode is truly divine inspiration. And it comes from, you know, I was asking myself, What do I want to share with the ladies this week?

What is something that I could really toss their way to get them thinking and and really looking at their thoughts and beliefs and I was inspired by one of the ladies in my fearlessly feral method program and It’s this so most of us like from a very young age. We are thrust into a culture of comparison Like from the minute you probably remember that, you know, there was somebody telling you, Oh, you’re, you’re the tallest kid in the class or you’re the youngest kid in the class or, you know, How come you can’t be as quiet as your brother or you know?

Susie Q over there is an excellent dancer. Why don’t you work on your tap dancing a little more or whatever, you know? We all experience a sense of comparison very early on in our lives whether it’s well intentioned or not We are always looking at other people for a measure of where we are in the spectrum of success, whatever that success may be.

And while there is no question that there is value in looking at where we fall in the spectrum of things, you know, just as a data point, the problem becomes when we give all of our sense of self worth, all of our value, And we place way too much authority in the quote, unquote, spectrum in the quote, unquote, measure.

Right? Like, so let me make this even more simple is, you know, when we aren’t consciously aware or consciously asking, well, whose measure is that? And what is that measure based on? We can find ourselves handing all of our sense of self worth, all of our power over to a measure that doesn’t even apply to us.

So let’s look at some other examples to make this idea even more clear, right? Like so many of us grew up with these ideas that, Oh, you know, if I’m not married by 30, you know, then, and, and very quickly after that, get a house and then start having kids and, and get my kids into soccer and, you know, get a promotion at work.

Like we have this idea that things are supposed to happen in a certain way. And if you, they don’t happen in that way, that there’s something wrong with us. Right, you know, and there’s also like we even do this as women when it comes to our concepts of beauty, right? We say oh, well, you know if this if I don’t look a certain way or my body’s of a different type then I’ll just have to settle for being quirky or an unconventional beauty and other crazy shit like that.

I mean Think about that example unconventional beauty. Well, who the fuck wants to be conventional is boring, right? and in all of these crazy things that we do to ourselves whether it’s the way we measure our personal success in this life or We’re measuring our personal desirability or beauty that same notion Horrifyingly, you know, spills over and seeps into our fertility journey, which by its very nature is inherently nonlinear.

Okay. It’s, we’re talking about something that we just cannot control the timing of. We cannot control the means of necessarily like we’re talking about the creation of life and that is not going to fall into our, the neat and tidy rules. That we arbitrarily create based on societal demands based on religious constructs or whatever it is by its very nature, unpredictable.

There is the hand of Gus involved in all of this. And if you’re new to this podcast, Gus is God universe source. So we have to appreciate that. We have to learn to become aware of the measures that are controlling our lives. And ask yourself, is that a measure that actually applies to me? Is that a measure that I, as a grown ass woman, am willing to live by?

Think about that very carefully. Think about that. Because what if somebody else’s measure of what beauty is, what success is, and what motherhood is, just doesn’t fucking interest you? What if it just It’s boring to you. And what if it just doesn’t honor the uniqueness of your life? Do you really want to be a cardboard cutout of every other Tom, Dick, and fucking Harry, Sally, Nancy, and whatever?

Do you want to do that? Or do you want to be you? You’ve really got to get that in your heart and mind. Because if you’re not aware that you have this operating in the background These constructs and these measures of quote unquote success are quietly killing you inside. Think about how different your day would be if you weren’t constantly Measuring yourself up against everyone else.

Like, what if you could scroll through your social media feed and instead of saying, oh shit, wow, you know, how did she lose 10 pounds in a lockdown and I’ve put on 20 or, you know, whatever shit you say, or gosh, you know, she must have gotten lucky, you know, uh, you know, what an amazing life she has. Instead of doing that shit, And quietly knocking yourself down and making yourself less than what if you could actually move through your day, move through your social media saying, wow, you know, this is awesome, you know, I’m super happy for them and meaning it right and not letting someone else’s success mean your failure, right?

That’s what we do when we are constantly stuck in this spiral of comparison. Someone else’s success has nothing to do with you. It has nothing to do with you. Quit allowing yourself to get sucked into the idea that if you aren’t like everyone else, then you must suck. Or if your journey is not wham, bam, thank you ma’am, immediately getting pregnant whenever you decide that somehow you suck.

Who cares how many IVF cycles you’ve done? Who cares how many quote unquote failures you’ve had? What actually matters is that you’re continuing to put one foot in front of the other. Spend no time comparing yourself to anyone else. It’s actually wildly unproductive. If anything, you getting stuck in a cycle of comparison will only bring you one step closer to robbing yourself of your dream.

Because if you’re comparing yourself To your sister, who’s insanely fertile and is like the old woman in a shoe. That puts you in a no win situation. You will always, even when you do have your baby, you will always be the one who was late, who was last, and, you know, who had, oh, just had some miracle tossed her away.

Right? You will never see yourself in the same light. So quit fucking doing that. It’s a waste of your time, and if you allow it to go much longer, it could actually rob you of the dream. You willing to do that? Are you really willing to allow comparison to put you in a situation where you just fucking quit?

Think about that. This is how dangerous getting in a cycle of comparison is. So, which brings us to the mantra, to end all mantras, my journey, my baby, my timeline. And I’ll say it again, my journey, my baby, my timeline. And when you really get this in your soul. You will stop fucking comparing yourself to everyone else on this journey, in your life, or anywhere else you look.

This is your journey. It doesn’t matter that babydust6789, on whatever stupid fertility board you might find yourself on at 2am, you know, says that, oh, you know, I just ate a bunch of pineapple and then poof, I was pregnant. Like, who the fuck cares? Send BabyDust6789 love. That’s her story. It’s not yours.

This is your journey. Your life is unique and your journey is going to be unique. Because your baby is going to be unique. Right? You don’t want somebody else’s baby. My journey. My baby. My timeline. And your timeline may be six months. Your timeline may be five years. It could be seven years. It could be 20.

Who cares? Like, it just doesn’t matter. You have to run your own race. Stay out of other people’s lane. Stay in your own. Okay? My journey. My baby. My timeline. And the sooner you get this in your heart, the more free you will be. Because it just, it’s basically reinforcing a universal truth. Not everything is going to happen just like the way it happens for everyone else.

And the sooner you get out of this idea that if it, that if it happens for you uniquely, that that is somehow less than, you are going to change your fucking life. Okay? Instead of keeping up with the Joneses and worrying about what the Joneses have or how quickly the Joneses got pregnant, Or, you know, how many babies the Joneses have, you know, when you stop paying attention to that and instead focus on what really matters and that is your life because you’re not living anyone else’s life.

You are living your own life, my journey, my baby, my timeline, your baby will come to you at the perfect time. I don’t give a shit what you think about. Well, you know, I can only have two years between my kids. That shit’s all made up. If you tell yourself, well, who, nobody can have a baby at 43 bullshit.

There are, there’s a woman right now at some crazy quote unquote old age. In a labor and delivery room somewhere or even at home giving birth, but she’s giving birth, right? There is a woman way older than you right now having a baby beating the odds. So focus on this mantra because this mantra, when you really get it in your soul will be your freedom on this journey.

My journey, my baby, my timeline. So the exercise to take all of this knowledge and, and this mantra is to the next level, my loves. Is practice it. Okay. Anytime in this week for the next seven days that you start to freak out about where you’re at on your journey. Go back to this mantra, my journey, my baby, my timeline.

The minute you start to say, oh shit, we’ve been on this journey five years and have had 78 IVF cycles. And you’re like, oh shit, this is never gonna happen. My journey, my baby, my timeline. Stay in your lane, mama. Stay in your lane. And love, if you are ready to make the shift into thinking, believing and taking action, like a woman who succeeds on this journey, my fearlessly fertile method program is for women who intend to get pregnant in the next 12 months and say hell yes to covering their bases, mind and body.

So you don’t have to look back on this time in your life with regret. I work with women who are committed to success to apply for your interview for this revolutionary program. Go to my website, www.FromMaybeToBaby.com and apply for an interview there. My methodologies help women around the world make their mom dreams come true.

Their results speak for themselves. If you don’t have a mindset for success on this journey, baby girl, you’ve got a gaping hole in your strategy. Let’s fix that shit and set you up for success. Till next time, change your mindset. Change your results. Love this episode of The Fearlessly Fertile Podcast.

Subscribe now and leave an awesome review. Remember, the desire in your heart to be a mom is there because it was meant for you. When it comes to your dreams, keep saying hell yes.

Rosanne offers a variety of programs to help you on your fertility journey — from Self-study, to Live, to Private Coaching.