EP103 She DECIDED To Have It All…Love of Her Life AND Baby

When Kirsty met Jon, she knew he was the man of her dreams. In her heart she also knew she was meant to have a baby with him. However, the journey to their baby was not so easy. Learn HOW taking a stand for her desires helped this amazing woman beat the odds in her 40s…naturally…on the eve of an IVF cycle. Dreams do come true!

Transcript:
Hey Gorgeous, if you want success on your fertility journey, you’ve got to have the mindset for it. It’s time to kick fear, negativity, doubt, shame, jealousy, and the whole clown car of low vibe fertility journey BS to the curb. I’m your host, Roseanne Austin, Fertility Mindset Master. Former prosecutor and recovering type A control freak perfectionist.

I use the power of mindset to get pregnant naturally and have my baby boy at 43, despite years of fertility treatment failure. I help women across the globe beat the odds on their fertility journey, just like I did. Get ready for a quick hit of confidence, joy, feminine badassery, and loads of hell yes for your fertility journey.

It’s time to get fearless baby, fearlessly fertile. Let’s do this. Welcome to the Fearlessly Fertile podcast, episode 103. She decided to have it all, love of her life and baby. Hey loves, I am absolutely excited to be here with you this week because this week’s episode is one that has been on my heart for so long, and I just absolutely love That my ladies are so kind and so generous to share their inspiring stories with you.

And I have a feeling you are going to fall in love with Kirstie as much as I have. And what I love about Kirstie’s story is she is truly an example of how my ladies are all about living a very big life, having it all love baby, passionate career. And really making a difference in the world through the work that they do, through what they give to their community.

They are just women that are just ready for that big, bold, juicy life. So when Kirstie met the love of her life, she was like, yeah, I’m having it all. I want this amazing man. I want to have a baby with this man. I want a very full life. And what Kirstie probably hadn’t anticipated was that living this very bold life was going to require her to step up her game in so many different ways.

So you’re going to hear about how this powerhouse woman really learned to tap into her femininity, speak her mind. Be a leader in her relationship without having to dominate or emasculate her man and find a way to blend families and open up space for an entirely new chapter in this family’s life.

You’re going to hear how this amazing woman made a massive transformation in six short months. She went from fearing that this baby was never going to come to being able to make her dream of conceiving naturally come true on the eve of an IVF cycle. My ladies are pretty incredible. Here’s my conversation with Kirstie.

Well, my darling woman, I think at some point you and I both imagined this moment happening. I did. Definitely, I did. Every time I would listen to a podcast interview with another woman, I would think, one day, I want that to be me because of what it would signify. Right, right. Well, so let’s talk about that because I, I think, you know, one of the coolest things about women sharing their stories in this way is at some point we were all that woman that might hear a story.

And like be completely moved and wonder if it’s possible, you know, like I remember listening to stuff and thinking, is it possible for me to, so we’ll dig into this and see and learn your story. So why don’t you tell the ladies listening, like, how’d you find yourself on this journey? So, um, my husband and I, John, we got married a couple of years ago and, um, we soon after getting married decided that we wanted to have a baby together and we’d both been married to other people before and had children with them before, but it was important for us to have our baby together.

And we didn’t come to that decision easily, which is probably one of the themes that will emerge in this conversation. But at that point, I was, I just turned 40 and, um, there was nothing really to suggest that I would have any. difficulty conceiving. But I have to admit, there was something in my, in my heart that was telling me this wasn’t going to be as easy as I wanted it to be.

It was almost like that was there from the beginning, even though that was almost the expectation I had. And I’m not exactly sure where that came from. I think society doesn’t, doesn’t help us. That’s what. Women of advanced maternal age, which is the term I hate, but you know, wherever that came from, there was very much a fear within me that this was going to be difficult and an expectation that it would be difficult.

And so we embarked on trying to conceive naturally. And after a few months, nothing happened. So we sort of saw different clinical. opinions about if there was anything wrong that might be creating a problem for us, a barrier for us. And that was a bit of a turbulent experience. We didn’t really get in front of the right clinician to begin with.

And that was almost, in some ways it was detrimental to our journey because I find that very negative experience. And another way it was. a good learning about how important it is to have the right people around you. And it may be very, very clear on what the right person, what sort of behavior the right person would display to me and how I would know.

So sometimes you have to go through that, don’t you? You have to, you have to experience what’s not so good before you appreciate what’s good. So, um, so we, we, we went through that process and at that point I was not, I wasn’t ready to go to IVF, just, I felt like I hadn’t given my body a chance, like I needed to give my body enough of a chance to be able to do this naturally before going to that next step.

And I didn’t feel we’d done that. Um, so I did. various other things. And I had to have some surgery to help. Um, because he did find actually when we find the right clinician, he did find that there was some things that probably happened to my body after having my daughter that, that should probably be corrected in order to increase our chances.

And he was really important because He made me believe that it would be possible. I remember coming round from the surgery and him coming into the room and actually being very animated and saying, you know, actually we had to do quite a lot. I feel really encouraged that you will have a really good chance of conceiving naturally.

And he knew my position at that point on IVF, he understood. But it was something that I would consider, but I wasn’t ready for it yet. And he really respected that even though he was both a gynecologist and an IVF specialist. So, you know, he, he had a vested interest in some way in pushing me down the IVF route, but he didn’t do that.

And I felt really like we were a team. So, so that was very important. Um, and a few more months went past. He sort of said, Oh, let’s give it six months and see what happens. So six months pretty much took us up to the beginning of the COVID lockdown. Um, and at that point we still hadn’t conceived naturally.

And we thought, no, actually I felt I was ready then to take that next step and explore IVF. So we went, we went through the clinic that this clinician who I trusted. It was based at, um, we didn’t really look at any others because I wanted to be treated by him. So that was really important. And we started that process, but then everything was locked down.

So we started that. We had a consultation with him at the beginning of April and then, then all the clinics shut and When they did reopen, I mean, they reopened a couple of months later, but it took quite a long time for them to get through a backlog and they were prioritizing certain cases. And so months, months, months went past and, and, you know, it still wasn’t our turn yet.

And there was a part of me when, when. We were told, you know, the clinics were closing, that was really upset and felt, you know, felt that, yeah, I did, I don’t know. I didn’t, I didn’t lose hope, but I certainly felt that that was a setback, but there was also a big part of me that simultaneously felt. Maybe this was supposed to happen and, and maybe, you know, maybe I just need to give my body a little bit more time and do some other things.

Yeah. I mean, in your heart of hearts, did you, you wanted to conceive naturally that, that was the dream. It was, it was definitely, it felt right for me. Um, and I don’t know. Why that is, and that’s absolutely no judgment on anybody who has IVF. I mean, we were going to go down that route, but, and I have many friends who’ve been down that route, who were great support to me in this process and could offer a lot of really helpful insight.

Um, but it just felt. That conceiving actually was, was right for me and was meant for me. Um, and, and in some ways when, when people, so those early on, there’s, there’s less positive experiences early on, actually, when I think back, a lot of what I felt was negative about them was that they were, they were jumping straight to IVF.

Almost like you just shouldn’t waste any more time. You should just, you should just do this. And it felt very contradictory to what I felt in my heart. And I think that’s why I reacted so badly to those people because. They just weren’t saying what they were saying wasn’t in harmony with what I was feeling.

So there was something inside me that just, yeah, just sort of knew that the best outcome for me would be to conceive naturally. Well, and you’re, you’re at this point where you’re saying to yourself, okay, or, or it would have been really easy to be seduced into the idea that you had to do it because here you are.

You’re. In your forties, you’ve got months where it hasn’t happened. You had this surgery. And even though your physician was excited and, you know, very spoke very positively about it. If we don’t control what’s going on in the background, you could have easily listened to some chatter that could have distracted you from the truth.

And that was your truth was, is that you wanted to conceive naturally. Didn’t have any judgment on any intervention, but what you knew was in your soul was different. And the universe intervened and put a stop to the IVF pathway for us, at least temporarily. So that. You know, sometimes it’s really helpful when the universe does that and takes out of your hands.

We can look at it in a different way and we can say, Oh, you know, that’s really hard because it’s taken out of our control. Or you can look at it and say, okay, it’s taken out of our hands. So I have to go with this path. And this may take me in a different, to a different place. It’s a divine delay. Yeah. We talk about that.

It’s like, you know, I think, and I, and I love that about you because you have that like softness and you have that openness about you because You know, that our natural instinct is like, Oh shit, you know, if I can’t control this, or if this looks different than what I thought it was going to look like, it must be bad.

When in fact, that’s not even true. Talk to us a little bit about, okay, so you’re at this point where you and John are looking down range and you’re like, well, we have no idea when this clinic is. Going to open up. Here we are in the middle of a pandemic. What, what was the next thing that you decided to do?

Like, as a resourceful woman. So, so I suppose just before that happened, I’d found you. So I’d been listening to your podcasts for a while and, and following you from a distance. Sort of lurking in the background and then, and then there was one day I was coming back from a meeting that I’d been running and I think I could feel I was pre menstrual.

I could feel my period was about to come and I was sort of, I was feeling really impulsive. So I just thought, you know what, I’m just, I’m just going to contact Roseanne. I don’t know what’s going to come of this, but I filled in your form online. And, um, waited to see what happened and then it just felt like the right thing to do, felt like the right time.

And then we had a conversation and I signed up to your, the eight week program. So I’d started doing this by that, by that point that we got into lockdown, probably I was maybe like four weeks in or something to the eight week course. So I was already starting to think differently about things and I was taking more.

Ownership of the journey. I think I was one thing that I really think changed about me was I became less of a victim And took more ownership over what was happening. Say more about that because I love it. I mean, isn’t it funny how we can own our own victimhood? Like once you’re out of it, you can see it.

And, and you and I are women, lovably type A control freaky. We, we do our shit. Like we would never in a thousand years think of ourselves. as victims? No, absolutely not. And probably nobody else would think of us as victims either. So say more about that because you literally, I mean, people don’t understand how powerful victimhood is in our lives and how crippling it can be if we don’t.

One, recognize it, and two, take responsibility for, for removing that, that cancer in our lives. Yeah. And I think, so my victimhood was particularly in relation to my husband, John. And I’ve really reflected on how that relationship has shifted over the last six to eight months. And so, so before we got married, you know, when.

There was quite a, uh, not, it was actually probably two years, maybe even longer where I felt really strongly that I wanted a baby with him and. He felt very strongly that he didn’t want a baby. And, and the reason for that was because our lives were complicated. We have children from previous relationships.

The dynamics with our exes were difficult. We have to travel between two locations in the UK because of where the children are. Logistically, it’s complicated, especially from somebody looking from the outside, it looks really complicated. And anybody would think. There’s no room for a baby in there for me.

I’d never thought about that. I just wanted a baby and that was, and I just sort of figured that everything else would figure itself out when that baby was there. But John, that was much, much more of a barrier and it created a lot of arguments between us, a lot of conflict and confrontation, um, a lot of hurt for me, um, a lot of guilt for him.

And it was, uh, it was a real poison in our relationship. And then, I don’t know exactly what happened in John’s, in John’s heart, but, um, just before we got married, he suddenly changed his mind about having a baby. And he suddenly Yeah. He got smart. He was going to give his woman what she wanted because he’s a wise and kind king.

And, uh, yeah, he’s always a little bit far, a little bit behind me. Um, so. But the thing was that all that hurt didn’t just go away. Um, so when we first started trying for a baby, there was an initial sort of excitement and, and, you know, oh, we can put all that behind us, but I’d never dealt with it. I just rushed it under the carpet and got on, got on with stuff because I sort of felt like I didn’t really have a choice.

And so there was a lot of fear and anger and resentment inside me still towards Um, and then that combined with that sort of terror that I had that at my age, maybe it wouldn’t happen, then I actually really blamed John for the fact that we’d waited so long. And so I felt angry at him, but I also felt angry at myself because I felt I hadn’t been clearer with him about my desires for a baby.

I’d sort of, I felt like I’d let him overrule me on that without having. Uh, enough of a voice in that decision. And so, I felt a huge amount of resentment towards him, but also towards myself, regret. And, and it’s a real, it’s a very poisonous emotion. So, when at first, every month when my period would come, I would get so angry at him.

It would all come out in anger towards him. I would shout at him, and swear at him, and there would be tears, and I’d want him to like, Get down on the floor and literally beg for forgiveness. It was really, um, extreme. And, but then there came a point where I did recognize that if that didn’t change, then this was, you know, nevermind having a baby, this is going to break our relationship if this pattern didn’t stop.

And. I sort of, I, I began to be clearer with him about what I needed from him, um, rather than sort of stewing on something or feeling angry about it, I would just be clearer with him up front about what I expected of him, what I wanted. Um, there would still be flashpoints, especially around the time when my period would come when I would feel more scared and angry, but that definitely got less and less and less.

Um, and I think I found that when I was particularly vulnerable, and maybe that time of when my period would come each month I was very vulnerable, I would easily slip into those old patterns and then I would really regret it later. So I would slip into a pattern of not being clear about what I wanted and then being angry at him for not giving it to me.

I think, I think, you know, this, I think as women we do sometimes expect our men to be able to read our minds. Oh yeah, totally. And it almost like, if we have to tell them what we want, then it, then that’s not good enough. Like they should just know, but that’s not really fair on them. No, and it’s, it’s not us and our power.

Like it literally is setting your partner up to fail. And I love that. I mean, Oh my God, Kirstie. I mean, I, well, I’ve told you a zillion times how much I love you, but I think I love you even more for being willing to admit this dark secret, not just for you, but all of us that carry this, like, you know, we’re, you know, I think there’s a unique problem for women who are so competent in their lives.

It’s almost like We kind of expect everyone else to operate on the same level and not that our partner is incompetent. Not at all. It’s just that we expect so much of ourselves that we tend to transfer that to everybody around us. And unwittingly disempower them to give us what we want because we expect people to just read our minds.

Yeah, absolutely. So when I stopped doing that, that really helped me to stop being a victim. So I would talk more openly about how I was feeling. And I did that without that fear of rejection or judgment that had been there before. Um, so I was more truthful about my expectations of him, not always completely without fear, because I think sometimes it is hard to ask for what you want and you’re putting yourself out there.

But the result was that he was really crystal crystal clear about what I. and that he could have, he could actually have a hope of meeting my expectations. Oh my goodness. Well, and who knew, like, think about it. You know, when you, you started, like who knew that part of thinking like a woman who succeeds would include you being clear with your partner that probably came out of nowhere.

Yeah. Oh, definitely. I just, yeah, that wouldn’t have entered my. I don’t think I would have thought about it. And I think the thing was, if I got pregnant right away at the very beginning in month one or month two, we never would have dealt with any of that stuff. Um, so I might’ve had, you know, I would have had a newborn baby, but I still wouldn’t be able to tell my husband what I needed from him.

And if I think. You know, I really think we had to get past all of that to be able to be ready for our baby to come. Because there was a lot of hurt there and healing that needed to be done in our relationship. And I think we are so much stronger having been through that experience together. Than, than we were at the beginning.

It’s easy to say that with hindsight when you’re in it, you don’t necessarily see that, but I, I think, you know, when you can look back on something, you can see that there was a reason why things happened the way that they did. Yeah. I mean, you’re being such a blessing right now because, you know, women hear me say that this, and I even wrote about it in my second book, was that this journey is a fucking blessing.

You may curse it and I totally get it. Like I hated it when I was in it. I wanted it to be over. I just wanted my son, but that’s like low hanging fruit thinking. That’s like, think that’s just like survival thinking strategic successful thinking is the kind of thinking that you do when you’re willing to stop and say, okay, what’s here for me.

Instead of just being in survival mode, saying this sucks, I want the pain to go away. The smarter question is what is here for me? I mean, because look at what you created. I love that you pointed that out because think about everyone just stops at the positive pregnancy test. People think, Oh, all my problems are going away.

Once I have this baby, once this journey, you know, once I’m on the other side of this journey. And it’s like. If your home and your relationship and the way that you live your life is a, is a, you know, dumpster fire, you know, in some ways, and you’re not getting the result you want, you’re only going to add fuel to the fire with an infant.

Yeah. Oh yeah. I mean, yeah. Add a baby into the mix and to over already strained relationship and that’s not a recipe for success. No. No. What else did you learn? Cause like, I’m like, I’m dying to know either this woman who, you know, you’re all the way up here in your professional life and then, you know, you’re, you’re opening this, these gifts up.

Like what else did you find out? Yeah. So I think another really important thing was. And, and a moment actually where the journey changed for me was when I just decided to believe that my baby was coming. And I think that was something which I’d sort of toyed with a little bit. And I think we we’d probably spoken about it on, on the coaching calls.

You know, I’m sure you asked the question, what if you just believed your baby was coming? And the thing is, when you first sort of say that to yourself. You don’t necessarily believe it, but then I started thinking about it more and more and then I had a real sort of epiphany moment when I remembered a moment just a few weeks after meeting John when it was crystal clear to me and that moment when I That was early days that I, one day I was going to have this man’s baby and, and so at this point in our relationship, everything was stacked against us because when John and I met, we were married to other people when we met and we met and there was a real thunderbolt moment between us and we, you know, we completely clicked and within weeks, it was within days, probably it was clear to both of us that We were each other’s destiny, but there were many, many things in the way of us being together.

I’m having such a Hallmark moment right now. I mean, I, I love it. I love it. I love this story. So I really knew with, with my whole body and my heart that I was supposed to be with this man and I was supposed to have his baby. And I was so clear on that. And when I remembered that moment much, much later, when I was on this journey, trying to conceive, It almost became impossible that our baby wasn’t coming because I would, I was so certain.

In that, in that moment, there was no doubt in my mind that that was my truth. And I realized that, you know, that no matter what was going, what else was going on in my head and the sort of, you know, those negative conversations would just sort of vanish because you know, that faith that that was my truth, not this was like the antidote to all of that.

And remembering that moment when my faith that we were gonna be together was so strong and I had no evidence whatsoever that that would be true, but I just knew it. And, you know, and, and it was that strong faith that I had, that we were meant to be together, that that really drove me at that point in my life to turn my life upside down, to make sure that this was the man that was by my side.

And. I just thought there’s no way that this isn’t meant to be like the universe wouldn’t have made me go through all that if this wasn’t meant to be, you know, those, those to find those moments of clarity when you’re on this journey is, is like absolute gold. And the, and the way I found them was meditating every morning, just thinking about what.

You know just seeing what came to me and memories like that would come to me from nowhere and there would be a message in them. It’s sometimes only with hindsight that those thoughts emerge, those feelings emerge from this backdrop of noise that we’re all living in all the time. But that’s why allowing that time for reflection is so important because if you just carry on with the noise, there’s no space for them to come.

So I think I really learned. About what it is to listen to yourself and your heart and what the universe is trying to tell you like it’s that is such a critical thing. And I mean, yet another golden nugget from this conversation is you decided to believe we think that this, this freedom. And this, this knowing comes from outside of us, we think, Oh, you know, I’m just gonna have a thunderbolt moment at, you know, the grocery store while I’m getting my groceries and just suddenly believe you consciously decided you were going to believe.

Well, I think when, when you get that certainty from within and nothing can break it, it’s, you know, if, if you get your certainty from facts and statistics, there’s always a fact of statistic that says the opposite, you know, you, you can find evidence for whatever you want to and the outside world really.

But it’s weak. It’s not, um, you know, it’s all rational stuff rather than, but when you find that certainty from within, it becomes your truth. Like I said, it sort of becomes like. Nothing can, can rock that it’s much, much more, it’s much stronger than, than certainty from a doctor telling you it will be okay.

Or, I mean, those things can help. They can help to bring that confidence that maybe helps you to ride out a difficult time. But, but you’ve got to believe it in yourself and. And I think that’s what’s really key. And having faith that there is, I mean, I, I don’t believe in God. I don’t have a particular religion that I follow, but I do, I, and have always believed that, that in fate and destiny, and even more so having met John in the way that I did and looking back on the journey that we went through to be together and things that happened in that journey that Didn’t happen by accident, but it just, my faith was so strong then that helping reminding myself of that time when I really did feel in my power, even though there was so much outside of my power, what enabled me to bring that power to this journey as well.

It made me feel like I deserved it. And isn’t that funny, like following the impulse. I love it. So many women tell me, I just, I just. felt like I needed to contact you, but I think it’s, I love that taking that belief in the way that you move through the world. You have had so many things lining up that when Kirstie follows her gut, when Kirstie has the guts to listen to what’s true for you, whether it feels impulsive or not, these things fall into place.

It’s like all of these things line up and every single step leads you in the direction of what it is that you want. What else? Like, what else? I mean, because this is like a very short time period where you’re making these fairly dramatic changes. Yeah. What else came through? The other really important thing for me was, so as I mentioned, the, the time around the time of my period each month would be a real flashpoint.

It would be a point, a low point for me, as I think probably many women feel, um, you know, it’s a, it’s a physical sign that you’re not pregnant, that, you know, it’s a physical sign of your failure in inverted Um, and I experienced that, you know, month after month and, and it, it becomes quite draining. Um, but then there was one day when, so I was doing a lot of this meditation every morning, spending an hour, you know, just sitting.

seeing what came into my mind. Sometimes there would be nothing that came into my mind. And then other times there would be a lot and some really sort of profound experiences. And I started to, started to recognize that I particularly have those profound experiences around the time of my period. And there was like, there was this really strong connection with the universe.

It was stronger at that point. There was, my spirituality was stronger. I was more available. Uh, for that, for that wisdom to come to me and I really enjoyed it and I would start, I started to look forward to my period coming each month because of what it would, because of what it, you know, it made me feel really powerful.

I remember writing to you one time and saying I was doing my meditation this morning and I, I felt really connected with the universe. I felt like I was, I was mother earth, like there was something weird that happened. And I just felt different. I felt like I was having some out of body experience. And it was just so Um, such an incredible experience that I would look forward to that and there would only be a small window each month, but it really changed my perspective and I started to pay a lot more attention to my cycle and how I felt at different points in my cycle, how connected I was spiritually, how I was in my relationship, how I felt in relation to my body, how dynamic, how much energy I had and realized that there was, you know, there were real Like all of these different dimensions of me were cyclical and actually started to try and pay much more attention to that.

And rather than trying to fight it, go with it. And so, you know, when I knew that I was at a point where I’d be particularly creative, then really try and harness that and enjoy that. Or another time when maybe I’m much more productive and You know, you become much more action oriented than just really play to those strengths.

And there was something very feminine about getting in tune with that and, um, noticing these things and then using them to my advantage. And, you know, I think there is probably a reason why society plays down the power that we have at different points in our feminine cycle, because it’s probably not something that men want us to talk about very much.

But, um, But really, honestly, I felt like if I could embrace that, then, you know, that would really, it was really a way of harnessing that feminine power and, you know, it would make me feel much more in control of all aspects of my life. And I, and I was really doing that, you know, in the, in the few months of the summer, especially during lockdown, there was more time to sit and think and meditate and we didn’t have to be going off all over the place.

That, that really. It was a good time to spend learning that about myself and dramatic departure too. Because when we think about the way that you started telling, you know, the, the kind of the dynamics in your journey was this, the tears when your period would become, there was so much anger and, and conflict.

And then you kind of find this other aspect of yourself who notices has a higher sense of self awareness. Is respectful of the cycle and the cyclical nature of, you know, the ebbs and flows of who she is throughout the month. And there’s just, even the way that you’re describing it, there’s like, here’s this masculine, you know, trying to get pregnant like a man.

And then there’s this softness where you’re actually receptive and in your feminine. Yeah, exactly. And I think that was really life changing and something which I will continue to do and teach to my daughter because I think it’s something that is so, you know, we, we’re all successful women, but if we can harness this side of ourselves too, then imagine what we can do, you know, it’s, it’s quite incredible.

So I think that was. That was another aspect, and it was linked with the having faith, and the spiritual connection, and the connection with the universe. You know, that was all wrapped up together. And also with the relationship stuff, because having those moments where you can really get that clarity is where you see the path that you need to take.

And, uh, but being able to connect with yourself in that way is necessary to be able to find that path. Were you surprised at how quickly you turned a corner? Yeah, I don’t know if I was, I don’t think I had any expectation on how quickly things would change for me. I think I learned and achieved more in that time than I would have anticipated.

Definitely. And it actually feels like quite a long time, but really it was only six months. It’s so funny because for me as an observer, getting to watch you. Like I could see when things were clicking. I could see when things were starting to like shift. And it always makes me giddy because I’m like, Ooh, she’s starting to get like, you know, and it’s, it’s just a wonderful thing to observe.

I’m always curious. Like, do you, you know, did she notice this in herself? Cause like I could see it, but I, I was always wondering, like, I wonder if she gets how exponential, because here’s the thing. Most people don’t do this. Most people will submit to their resistance. Most people will not do what you’ve done.

So it’s really, really important to give yourself credit because what you have done in this, you know, relatively short period of time, most people just don’t do that ever. No, but I’m so glad that I did because The growth in me as a whole person is just, yeah, so significant. And that transcends to every aspect of my life, you know, my relationship with John, my relationship with his boys, my relationship with my daughter, um, our work, uh, you know, every aspect of it is, is touched by that.

So, and, and it brings. a different level of wisdom to everything that I’m doing. When you have that level of self awareness, you can see and recognize things in other people as well. And I think that’s really, that’s really important for, for me. Yep. And I remember there was a call and I’m like, you know, Kirstie’s usually busy on the weekend.

She doesn’t normally hang out to the very end of the call. And I remember you had some particularly, like you were smiling like a Cheshire cat. And I remember thinking to myself, I’m like, This woman is smiling really, really big. So tell us what that smile was about. Yeah, so I remember that call because, uh, it was one of those calls where actually there were an awful lot of people who wanted to say something.

There were an awful lot of people who had their hands up and wanted your coaching. And I was sort of waiting my turn and, and I thought she’s bound to get to me. Like, cause I made sure I got my hand up really quickly when I got on the call, but she’s bound to get to me sort of in the first hour. And then I was like, no, okay.

Second hour. And I was getting more and more like nervous, excited. And then, um, and I think you’d also said, Oh, I’ve got a hard stop today. And I thought, Oh my God, what happens if she doesn’t get to me? But you did. And, um, the reason I was so excited was because I had just literally a couple of hours before done a pregnancy test and found out I was pregnant.

It was so nice to be able to tell you, like, Live like having just found out because you didn’t have any clue and um, and you were so excited and it was just felt like such, you know, such a prize to be able to tell you and all those other ladies live, you know, and it’s, I just remember. My heart is always so open to like all of this.

Like I never get tired of hearing these things because it’s such a, for me, like listening to that and seeing you and seeing how much you changed and the metamorphosis on so many different levels. It just felt right. Like, uh, that’s why I love this work is because when you see a woman step into her truth, And become really like, allow this journey to be an unfolding and allow herself to grow exponentially and use this to her advantage and think, believe and take action completely differently, you know, not just on this journey, but in her life.

It’s just extraordinary. Like, it doesn’t surprise me that in a relatively short period of time, you went from anger and despair and conflict to this. What do you think was the biggest lesson you learned? I think it was that things happen in our lives for a reason, and so we need, and sometimes that reason isn’t obvious, but we need to have faith that, that the journey, like life, you know, the journey that we’re on might be difficult at times, but there is, there is a reason why we are, why it’s happening.

for us this way. Sometimes you have to go with it and maintain that faith of where you want to get to and that vision of where you want to get to because even if the journey isn’t a straightforward one for me to be, then it doesn’t mean you’re not going to get there. We got to know, like, how far along are you today?

I am nearly 24 weeks and we’ll be having a baby boy in around April time. Oh my goodness. I mean, Look at where you were. I mean, just, it just blows my mind. Okay. So April of 2020 lockdown pandemic chaos, April, 2021 miracle baby. That’s a pretty damn good, you know, 12 months. Yeah, absolutely. And I know it’s been a really tough year for a lot of people in many, many different ways, but for me, actually, it’s been completely transformational.

Um, and, and all aspects of my life. So I think there’s always, there’s always positives that can come out of difficult situations and it’s up to us to. To, you know, to find them for ourselves. You know, every time, you know, you ladies come on and share, it’s just, it just is going to touch people’s lives like all over the world and how, you know, I, you know, I, we go back to the very beginning of what we were talking about.

We’ve all been there wondering if it can happen for us. And it’s a giant hell. Yes. Like be that woman, you made a decision to be the woman that beat the odds. And you did. So, bravo, woman. Thank you for being on. Oh my god, you guys! Isn’t that story just the stuff of fairy tales? I just fucking love that.

Like, the hard nosed former prosecutor in me just still goes all ooey gooey inside when I hear about love. True love. Romance. Babies. Overcoming obstacles. And, and, you know, real love winning in the end. And dreams coming true. I mean, this is This is the stuff that just makes life worth living. And you’ve got to know that I am sure Kirstie would tell you herself if she could, like, anybody can do this.

Anyone who takes a stand for their dreams can create the most wonderful reality. And I hope that you are truly inspired by Kirstie’s story. Loves, you get to decide to have it all. But you got to be that woman. You got to be that woman. And if you want to learn what I taught Kirstie, my fearlessly fertile method program is for women who intend to get pregnant in the next 12 months and say, hell yes, to covering their bases, mind and body.

So you don’t have to look back on this time with regret. I work with women just like Kirstie who are committed to success. To apply for your interview for this program, go to my website, www.FromMaybeToBaby.com and apply for an interview there. My methodology is help women around the world make their mom dreams come true.

Their results speak for themselves. If you don’t have a mindset for success on this journey, baby, you got a gaping hole in your strategy. Let’s fix that shit and set you up for success. Till next time, change your mindset. Change your results. Love this episode of the Fearlessly Fertile Podcast? Subscribe now and leave an awesome review.

Remember, the desire in your heart to be a mom is there because it was meant for you. When it comes to your dreams, keep saying, Hell yes!

Rosanne offers a variety of programs to help you on your fertility journey — from Self-study, to Live, to Private Coaching.