EP133 Lack & Scarcity: Claim It

This post was authored by Rosanne on Rosanne Austin.

Now that you know what lack and scarcity is, here’s the #1 thing you’ve got to do when you recognize it in your own life. The exercise in this episode is nothing short of mind blowing!

The post EP133 Lack & Scarcity: Claim It appeared first on Rosanne Austin.

Hey Gorgeous, if you want success on your fertility journey, you’ve got to have the mindset for it. It’s time to kick fear, negativity, doubt, shame, jealousy, and the whole clown car of low vibe fertility journey BS to the curb. I’m your host, Roseanne Austin, fertility mindset master, former prosecutor and recovering type A control freak perfectionist.

I use the power of mindset to get pregnant naturally and have my baby boy at 43. Despite years of fertility treatment failure. I help women across the globe beat the odds on their fertility journey. Just like I did get ready for a quick hit of confidence, joy, feminine, badassery, and loads of hell. Yes.

For your fertility journey. It’s time to get fearless, baby, fearlessly fertile. Let’s do this. Welcome to the fearlessly fertile podcast. Episode 133 lack and scarcity claim it. Hey, loves. I’m so excited to dig into episode two of this three part series on lack and scarcity. It’s the scourge of a winning mindset on your fertility journey.

You can’t be fearless when lack and scarcity are running the show. Now, it may peek out from the behind the curtain a bit, but it certainly can’t run the show. When you are fearless and intend to succeed on this journey. Let’s be clear about something right out of the gate. You are on this journey to make your dream of being a mom come true.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. There’s nothing selfish about that. And I know that with the last episode, you know, that might have gotten like, questions about selfishness and, you know, am I wanting too much? All kinds of stuff, you know, can easily, I warned you, I told you. That this series can be super triggering in the best possible way, because so many of us labor under stories of lack and scarcity that we haven’t even recognized, which is why I’m going to the trouble to be willing to shake shit up for you a little bit.

So you can finally see it because Lack and scarcity, the mindset that keeps that alive in our lives, it’s one of the most dangerous places to be, because it literally will kill your dreams. It will suck the life right out of your dreams. And I am certain that once you’ve gotten through all three episodes of this podcast, You are going to this.

Well, not three episodes of this podcast, but the three episodes of this podcast series, you are going to see how just corrosive is the word that I’d used before, but you’re going to see how corrosive and destructive this mindset is being in lack and scarcity. And it’s pretty much Going to be the major predictor of of how you’re going to respond or react to things on this journey.

So it is critical that this is time well spent getting very familiar with this topic, which is why we are moving through it in the way that we are. And I just want to underscore the fact that there’s nothing wrong with you having these desires in your heart, the desire to be a mom. The desire to fucking have it all.

All of the things that really light you up. When you, when you push lack and scarcity out the door, and you instead stand in really what makes your heart sing, it makes your heart sing for a reason. It is actually in alignment. It just makes you so happy and it makes you happy because it’s what’s real, right?

It’s really important that you understand that if this desire is in your heart, it’s there because it was meant for you. And you have to start thinking in those terms. If you desire it, there is a way to get it period. And you know, we’re going to get into questions of deserving and things like that, uh, later on in our discussion here, uh, because it actually has a very, very interesting interplay with our lack and scarcity, but it’s really important to, to start with that as our foundation.

Because if, if you don’t believe that the desire in your heart is there because it was meant for you and you’re willing to put all your chips on that and you’re, you’re really invested in that idea, lack and scarcity is unquestionably going to play a bigger role for you. And it is definitely an uphill climb.

So if we can start with a baseline of, look, I fucking, I know this is for me. I may not know how to get there. I know, I may not know when that’s going to happen, but I at least can acknowledge that I feel this in the, in my soul and that I’m willing to explore what to do with that, right? Which is what we’re doing here, working on mindset, really getting you clear about these things.

That gives us something to work with it. This this at least vague sense that this is meant for you. Okay, we go way farther into that and really bolstering that in my fearlessly fertile method program, but for our purposes here We’ll just start with that The desire in your heart to be a mom is there because it was meant for you and we are going to operate from that perspective.

Now, to recap just a bit, we’ll start with laying out what my working definition for lack and scarcity is in our context here. Lack and scarcity is the belief or system of beliefs that there is a finite amount of something And within that belief is the presupposition that there isn’t enough for you, you specifically, that is baked into this bullshit.

Okay. The presupposition that there isn’t enough for you specifically. This belief system is also laden with victimhood, which makes it debilitating to the untrained mind, the mind that has not learned how to think, believe, and take action like a success story on this journey. It’s the idea that Not only is X or, you know, blank scarce, but that there’s nothing you, as an individual, can do about it.

You just have to accept this misery and be jealous of others who do have it. And this can present itself in a belief that there is a limited and finite amount of time, money, resources, chances or opportunities, blessings. Love, to name just a few. In last week’s episode, I asked you to look around your life and see where lack and scarcity Was up to no good.

Were you able to see it? Did you see any patterns that shocked you? Did you see them then immediately defend them so as to make them appear quote unquote prudent or good judgment, even though the result sucks? You know, maybe you looked around your life and you were you were so blind to the lack and scarcity stories that you’re like, I don’t have any lack and scarcity stories.

And it’s, and I don’t say that with criticism. Like when, when this idea was first presented to me and you know, I was like, I’ve got really nothing to have any lack or scarcity over. I mean, I’ve got my education. I’m a lawyer. I, you know, easily make six figures. I have the love of my life. There’s no lack and scarcity, but the truth was I was like singing the lack and scarcity anthem.

Because on the outside, yes, all of that looked like, you know, yeah, I had it going on, but the way that I viewed myself, it was so like downright lack and scarcity. It was crazy. So on the external, it looked like I had it all going on, but the way that I saw myself, the way that I saw my worthiness, the amount of money like that I would agonize over the opportunities, the stories that were running in my head were all 100 percent authentic, Low, down, dirty, O.

G., lack, and scarcity. Just make sure that if you listen to last week’s podcast and you said to yourself, I don’t feel any lack and scarcity. I’m so blessed. I got all this shit. Uh uh. It’s not, we’re not talking about surface shit. We are talking about the stories you tell yourself about time, money, resources, chances and opportunities, blessings, love, and all of that good stuff.

And actually, just to make an additional point about the example I just gave, When you tell yourself, oh, I have it all, you know, I’ve got nothing to feel lack and scarcity over and you make yourself small for wanting more, that, my love, is lack and scarcity. So, see how sneaky that is? Now, remember, we can get super defensive of our stories even if they aren’t true because we have repeated them enough.

That they begin to sound true. So also watch out for that, okay? That’s, I mean, Lack and Scarcity is one of the most hardcore saboteurs that, you know, and I think I mentioned that last time, but I’m, it’s worth repeating again here. It is insidious. It will convince you of the craziest shit. So just go back and make sure that, you know, as we’re moving through this series, that you go back and make sure that you’ve looked very carefully around your life, which we’re going to get into more here, but that you are not glossing over where very real lack and scarcity exists.

Okay. Now, we’re going to zero in and get very specific in this episode about where lack and scarcity operates in your life. Pretty cool, right? And for sure, look, this can be a multi front battle. But don’t get sidetracked by the number of places you might have seen. seen it operating in your life. So, you know, there, there can be many different versions of this.

You could have said, shit, I’ve got 17 places right now where I feel lack and scarcity. You could have gone the other way, you know, complete pendulum swing saying, oh, I’ve got no lack and scarcity to my life. I have so much to be blessed for. And like Pollyannad your way through it, thereby making yourself small, which is in essence, the lack and scarcity story that I just pointed out.

Just be aware of how this shows up. We simply want to know where the hot buttons are here for you. Because as soon as you can claim where this plays out in your life, you can be aware of it and you have a fighting chance to do something about it. Okay, whether you’ve got 17 places that are, you know, running loose with lack and scarcity or you’ve blinded yourself to your lack and scarcity because you want to make yourself small, like you make yourself wrong for wanting more.

You say, Oh, I already have, you know, so much, so I can’t want more, which is in essence a lack and scarcity story. On either extreme, be aware that that might be operating your life so you can do something about it. Now, one of the best ways to identify and claim specifically, okay, now we’re, as I said before, we’re going to get super specific about this because you may have said, Oh, I see it at work.

I see it in the way that I approach time, the way I approach money, the way I approach my family, what I think about love. One of the best ways that you can get even more targeted and therefore more strategic about the way that you approach lack and scarcity in your life is by looking at the excuses You make on a daily basis.

Now, I did a whole episode on excuses is episode 107. The title is excuses are your decoder ring. It’s a super important episode. Listen to that after you listen to this and you will see how wild and dangerous the interplay between lack and scarcity is with our excuses. Indeed excuses are your decoder ring for self sabotage.

And what’s even more telling about them is they show what you really think about what you deserve. Your excuses are so telling about what you think you deserve. Our excuses reveal our lack and scarcity stories and they are demonstrative about what we think we deserve. It’s really interesting the way that we will put limits on certain things or whether it’s time, money, circumstances.

It, it is very telling. About what we think we deserve and so episode 107 and this one here are really they work really well together. So do make sure that you go back and listen to that now. Let me give you a hypothetical to put this into some context and we will use one of the most tired and interestingly easy to defeat excuses or lack and scarcity stories that gets used on this journey about a zillion times a day and that’s money.

And across the board, the two primary excuses that people use to not have what they want in this life are time and money, and those pretty often go unquestioned. And so, money, especially on this journey, the exact excuse can come in three basic forms with like a zillion sub flavors, and they can sound like this.

I can’t do it because I don’t have the money. Or, that’s too expensive. Or, I’ve already spent too much. What’s insane is these are all the same things we could say about a fucking car, okay? So let’s get recalibrated, my love. We’re talking about your dream. Of becoming a mom. All right, super important apples and oranges.

It’s not the fucking same thing as a car. Okay, that should be pretty basic. But what’s crazy is our lack and scarcity stories will have us use the measurements we would use for a car when it comes to having a baby. Okay, apples and oranges. So that’s the first fallacy ultimately that we’re going to expose about these stories.

But here’s a twist, because in order for you to fully claim this, there’s another thing that you need to think about. So one, you look at your excuses. What are the excuses that you’re currently using? And in our example here, we’re just zeroing in on money. And to take this to the next level is to ask yourself, do you believe you As an individual deserve to find a way to get that money.

Do you believe you as an individual deserve things that might be quote unquote expensive? Whatever that means because it’s all relative, right? And do you believe you deserve to keep investing in your dreams? Do you deserve this mama? If you actually believe you deserve it, you will find The money. It is that simple.

And for those of you who still try to use the excuse, my partner won’t let me, or I need to talk to my husband, let me ask you this. Do you deserve, as a grown ass woman, to have your partner’s support, even if they don’t understand or agree? Because those are two very different things, okay? Having their understanding is one thing, having their agreement is one thing, but as an individual, as a grown up, you don’t need their permission, okay?

Do you deserve to stand up for you? Ooh, chew on that one. One of the most interesting tests of our worthiness, cause that’s really ultimately what we’re talking about. So our lack and scarcity stories are revealed by our excuses. Okay. And our excuses are very telling about what we think we deserve. Okay.

Multi layered inquiry here. It’s super deep shit, but it’s really, really important. So, one of the most interesting tests of our worthiness is how we respond to opposition. Do you cave, or do you move forward? I have more to say on that, but that’s for another episode, because you know when you’re making excuses.

To shrink back and, you know, all kinds of crazy stuff, but it’s really important that you ask yourself specifically when it comes to money, when it comes to time, which are the two things we’re going to zero in on here. Do you deserve it? Very, very important because if you don’t even play with the idea of whether or not you deserve it, it’s going to be very difficult for you to overcome these things.

Okay, which we’re going to get to later, but it’s it’s an important part of the calculus look at your excuses and then ask yourself Well, do I deserve this for every excuse that you give about money? Ask yourself, well, do you deserve it? Do you deserve to, to figure out how to get the money or whatever? So, and you know, look, when you are operating in lack and scarcity, particularly when it comes to time or money, you’re going to assign some arbitrary number to your dream.

We all do it. We will make up some bullshit about what’s too quote unquote expensive or what’s too much. When we’re in lack and scarcity, instead of thinking critically about how we can make something work, being creative and being willing to make our own rules because of our own fear, we’re just going to fall back.

On what other people have told us. Remember what I laid out in episode one of this series, particularly when it comes to money, instead of taking the leap, we shrink back then wonder why nothing changes. And as a side note, here’s an important truth to keep in mind. Changing your results requires time and money.

Sometimes both. You don’t get it for free. Nothing is free. The things that matter most in life require investment of time and money, not always in equal measure, but more often than not, both are on board. I mean, and unquestionably, somebody’s bound to be listening to this and say, That’s not correct, Roseanne.

I mean, love is free. No, it’s fucking not. Real love is an investment of the most valuable thing we have, and that is time. You can always make more money. You can’t make more time. So be clear about that. Nothing is free. You’re going to have to make an investment. You can leverage your time for sure, but you’re not going to make more time.

And I hope that really sinks in for you, because regret is a bitch. If you want something to change on your journey, something’s got to give, mama. And, oh, I know some lack and scarcity stories are going to be kicking with that statement, but that’s fine. The point of this Is to get you out of a pattern that is literally blinding you to opportunity that is going to crash your dreams if you don’t unfuck it.

Okay, so speaking of time, let’s now zero in on the number two excuse people use when they are in lack and scarcity. Time. Let’s also put this into context. People use the following excuses when they’re in lack and scarcity. If it was going to happen, it would happen by now. Or. It’s crazy for me to think I can have a baby at this age.

Or where am I going to find the time to do all of this? Now, just like with money, all of these excuses can seem legit on the surface, particularly when you are ruled by statistics, lack and scarcity stories about how many chances you have. Or when People should quote unquote have babies, right? This, these stories that people tell us about when we should be having our babies and what’s late and all that other crazy stuff.

Really take note of how lack and scarcity shows up for you in this area. It’s a minefield of guilt and shame, much like money. Do you see the pattern? I have heard women in their forties say, well, I’ll give myself two years. And if it doesn’t happen then, well, I guess it wasn’t meant for me. And I want to scream, where did you get the two years from?

It’s totally made up and is one of my favorite ladies in the whole world has said all the way from the Scottish Highlands who got pregnant naturally at 50 said, if you can bleed, you can breed. None of this is about the amount of time spent. It’s about how you spend it. Are you fucking using your time wisely?

Are you using it to your best advantage? If you remember Kate in Ireland, she found herself. When she got her mind right, she found herself years later, quote unquote older, far more fertile when she started thinking, believing, and taking action differently. Ended up getting pregnant naturally. So it’s not about the amount of years you’ve been doing this, it’s about how you’ve been going about this.

How are you using your time? So, If you’re stuck in a Lack and Scarcity story about your time, your age, or whatever, take a second look. Because when you use your time wisely, you’ve got all the time in the world, baby. Look at all of the women who have appeared on this podcast that have had babies in their 40s when most people would have fucking given up.

If you are in a lack and scarcity story about time, let’s see what it might say about what you think you deserve in this area, okay? We’re running it through that same calculus that we used with money. Do you deserve to keep going no matter how long it fucking takes? Do you deserve a shot at your dream, regardless of your age?

Do you deserve to make time to do what it takes to become a mom? Are you deserving of time, woman? Now, while the time we have spent here together is focused on money and time, because they’re the two biggest excuses people use when they are in lack and scarcity, the same calculus applies to ferreting out all of your other lack and scarcity stories that are ultimately related.

Look at the excuses you’re currently making. They are a very powerful indicator of a lack and scarcity story. And they say a lot about what you believe you deserve. Do you deserve a solution to whatever excuse or lack and scarcity story that’s presenting itself? You know, you might even be saying, I will lose love if I do X, et cetera.

Loss of love or understanding is also a huge lack in scarcity story. So run through those, my loves. Your dream is so worth it. So here’s an exercise to take what I’m sharing with you today. To the next level claim lack and scarcity in your life. Time to tell the low down dirty truth, my love. So step one, identify the exact lack and scarcity stories you tell on this journey, what do you tell yourself about money?

What do you tell yourself about time? What do you tell yourself about your age? What does all of this tell you about what you believe? You deserve super important step to identify exactly which one of these is the biggest block for you on this journey. If you keep allowing it to run you, be honest. What is it going to cost you?

What is it costing you today to be stuck in this lack and scarcity story? This specific story that you identify as your biggest block. What will it ultimately cost you? If you continue to let it run the show. And here’s why this is so important. By you answering this inquiry, you are getting real about what’s at stake.

One of the most insidious aspects of our lack and scarcity stories is the way they parade as prudence and sensibility. But they will cost you your dream. Okay, go back and listen to episode 107 in conjunction with this. Are you willing to walk away from your dream of becoming a mom because the investment, for example, turned out to be 150, 000 instead of 100, 000 that you arbitrarily set?

Seriously? Just because nobody in your family or nobody in your acquaintance has had to figure out how to come up with that amount of money doesn’t mean that you can’t. And what’s even crazier, just as a side note, is that no one scoffs at the idea of having to invest that amount of money when it comes to a business.

But having a baby? We apply a warped sense of value and make ourselves wrong for making investments of that size. Doesn’t motherhood mean as much, if not more to you? Think about it. People, like, these days, like, cars cost at least 50 grand. If you’re buying something new and you’re, you’re family oriented, you’re thinking, I’m going to get a big old Suburban or, or Tahoe or whatever, like, those cost a lot of money.

What about your dream of being a mom to fill that car? Is that worth it? What would it be worth to you? Just a thought, mama. And step three, if you love this podcast and the free, deep, crazy good content my team and I bring you every week, take a moment right now and give us a five star review. Not only does it show your appreciation, it helps other women find this work.

Love, Lack and Scarcity is a bitch. It is the leading killer of dreams on this journey. You have just identified which Lack and Scarcity story is the biggest block for you on this journey. There are less than four months left in this year. Spend two of them with me learning to think, believe, and take action like a woman who succeeds on this journey, and thinking in a whole new way can help you create new results.

Just think about what you could be saying to yourself on December 31st, 2021. Think about how what you do now could put you on track for a due date. In 2022, my fearlessly fertile method program is for women who intend to get pregnant in the next 12 months and say hell yes to covering their bases, mind and body.

I work with women who are committed to success. To apply for your interview for this program, go to my website www.FromMaybeToBaby.com and apply for an interview there. My methodology has helped women around the world make their mom dreams come true. Their results speak for themselves. If you don’t have a mindset for success on this journey, baby, you got a gap in hole in your strategy.

Let’s fix that shit and set you up for success. Till next time, change your mindset. Change your results. Love this episode of The Fearlessly Fertile Podcast. Subscribe now and leave an awesome review. Remember, the desire in your heart to be a mom is there because it was meant for you. When it comes to your dreams, keep saying hell yes.

Rosanne offers a variety of programs to help you on your fertility journey — from Self-study, to Live, to Private Coaching.