EP214 Excuse Buster: Time

Excuses are the killer of dreams–especially when it comes to mindset. In this new 3-part series, we are going to take on the most insidious and empower you to begin changing the way you think about each of them, so you will stop using them, when it comes to the missing piece of the fertility puzzle: MINDSET. First on the chopping block? TIME. If you don’t think you have time to work on your mindset, think again.

Transcript:
Hey Gorgeous, if you want success on your fertility journey, you’ve got to have the mindset for it. It’s time to kick fear, negativity, doubt, shame, jealousy, and the whole clown car of low vibe fertility journey BS to the curb. I’m your host, Roseanne Austin, Fertility Mindset Master. Former prosecutor and recovering type A control freak perfectionist.

I use the power of mindset to get pregnant naturally and have my baby boy at 43, despite years of fertility treatment failure. I help women across the globe beat the odds on their fertility journey just like I did. Get ready for a quick hit of confidence, joy, feminine badassery, and loads of hell yes for your fertility journey.

It’s time to get fearless baby, fearlessly fertile. Let’s do this. Welcome to the Fearlessly Fertile podcast, episode 214, excuse buster time. Hey, my loves. I am super excited to be here with you this week because we are kicking off a three part series on excuse busting. Now, I was inspired to do this series.

Because I wanted to help you correct one of the biggest misconceptions that we have on this journey. We run around, okay, this is with an untrained mind. When your mind is hijacked by fear, doubt, negativity, the past, the future, whatever people are saying, you can’t think straight. And this is why I emphasize so much that you’ve got to learn how to think, believe, and take action like a woman who succeeds on this journey.

The reason for that Is the only existential threat to our dream of becoming a mom is us. It’s not some rogue doctor, it’s not taking the wrong supplements, it’s not eating enough kale, it’s not our partner, it’s not our mother, it’s not what the forums say, it’s us. We don’t have to look any farther than ourselves to find the reason why.

We will give up on this journey. And I know for a fact that a lot of people don’t want to hear this. But here’s the deal. Part of the reason why I show up for you every fucking week, rain or shine, is I know what it’s like to get to the other side. I know what it’s like to push past the limits that other people put on you.

I, I know what it’s Like to have really shitty statistics like being thrown at you all the time and being the person that, you know, the physicians are, you know, they have some compassion for you, probably, but kind of side eye, right? And if You don’t have somebody in your corner telling you the straight dope about what it takes to succeed.

How are they making good on, on their responsibility to you? As another human, as a friend, as a mentor, as just some perhaps random stranger that just wants to fucking love on other people, you know? I know that this series is going to unquestionably be triggering, but you may as well get triggered by this, so that you are not later triggered by your fucking regret.

Because you will get over this trigger, I’m not so sure about the regret. And I am very grateful to the people that I have in my life today that love me enough that when they hear, I mean, look, we all make some fucking excuses, you know, that Hold me accountable when I’m not being my best and not from a place of perfection, but truly, you know, loving me enough to want me to live a great life.

And look, this is my living, okay? Like this, I’m obsessed with this shit. And so we all have moments where we’re like, okay, wait a minute, I’m a little bit off track here. But this is the inspiration behind this. And I am extraordinarily unapologetic at how direct I’m going to be with you in this series.

And, you know, you can get mad about it if you want. Set some time on your phone, be mad at me for like two minutes, because I know that you could be grateful at some point for decades. So indeed, keep this loving intention behind all of this at the forefront as we move through this material together. And look, if you’ve listened to my podcast for long enough, you know how I am about excuses.

And perhaps this three part series just isn’t for you. It’s totally fine. I absolutely believe in a woman’s right to be fucking miserable. So I’ll just see you in three episodes if you want. We’ll just reconnect then. Either way, I got you, boo. Now, while I understand that we have, as a society, in a lot of ways, been conditioned into a degree of learned helplessness by having our excuses tolerated by those around us.

Where I find them intolerable is when it comes to the dreams that make your life worth living. Namely, in our context, the dream of becoming a mom. It’s one thing to make excuses about not wanting to take the trash out, get a tooth pulled, or pay taxes to a bloated, irresponsible, and tyrannical government that doesn’t actually give two shits about your welfare.

Wants to see you confined to 15 minute cities, eating ze bugs, glued to your televisions, keeping us at war with each other, and most definitely too scared to ask the inconvenient questions. Those things are fucking miserable, but making sabotaging excuses about your baby? No, ma’am. No, ma’am. That is something entirely different.

That’s where anyone that legitimately cares about you living the full and complete life that God Universe Source intended for you would draw the line. If the subject of facing your excuses makes you uncomfy, as I said, the series might not be for you. I’ve put my heart into this series for the women who are actually committed to winning on this journey.

It’s for women who are all fucking in, even if They are scared, and are not quite sure how to get there. But they are so in this that they can almost smell that baby smell, and their ovaries light up at the thought of their baby. I’m telling you, my darlings, that’s really what it takes to win on this journey.

Now, just as a side note as we get into the series, it’s important to look around your life right now and think about how much you have formed kinship with those around you based on excuses. It’s fascinating to me how much we connect through excuses and the tolerance of them. It’s the go along to get along mentality with most people being very uncomfortable with both facing truth and holding others accountable for being their very best.

That last part is very interesting. Being your very best will ensure you having the very best. Whether it’s experiences, material things, and the people around you. This is why excuse busting and this series is so important. And think about this. This is a case in point. We all have either a sibling or some extended relative that’s fucking lazy, a moochers, a couch surfer.

Everyone dreads having them come to Thanksgiving or Christmas, right? But yet, nobody says shit. Just to keep the peace. That’s what I’m talking about here. We form kinship and we interact based on excuses and this weird agreement that, uh, it’s okay for somebody to not be their best. And then we find it, you know, being tolerated in us.

It fucking sucks. It’s like a cancer. And you really don’t want any of that shit around you because as the adage goes, you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with. Do those people demand the best for themselves and thereby demand the best for you? Or are you all just engaging in some codependent bullshit that keeps everyone down?

Are the people around you afraid of who or what you could become? What’s the risk to them if you live your dream? Maybe they think that you won’t need them anymore. It’s fascinating and unsettling shit, right? Just tuck this into your back pocket as we move through this series, and you just might find yourself beginning to step out of the matrix of your excuses, as well as those tolerated by those around you.

And ultimately, you’ve been trapped in that mess. And look, you’ve got to know that I’m not pontificating about this from my high horse, as I said earlier. I’m talking about this in this way because I had to wake myself up. I did the nasty work of owning up to my own bullshit about my excuses and what I tolerated.

In addition to what those around me tolerated, none of what I’m sharing in this series is about making you wrong. It’s about helping you get right, so you don’t give another fucking minute to the very excuses that could rob you of your dream and damn you to a life of regret and mediocrity. Because let’s face it, people who live by and perpetuate excuses are fucking mediocre.

And all you have to do is look around their lives for the proof. They have more stories about what could have been and what they’re afraid of than they have stories of triumph, growth, and resilience. Just check it if you doubt it. Here’s why investing your time in this episode and ultimately this series is smart as fuck.

One of the top three excuses people use to murder their dreams is time. But the problem is we have been given fake fucking news about time. We have been indoctrinated with warped ideas about how and where to invest it. We’re going to start on fucking that today. Time is the most valuable thing that we have because there is a limited supply of it.

In our physical existence. And what’s even more humbling is nobody has a clue when theirs is up. So if you don’t treat your time like it is the precious resource it is, you will live a life of regret. Having been shitty with my own time for decades, I love you enough to tell you what you might need to hear right now.

And to help you out with this, my team and I created a really cool worksheet to go along with this episode, so go to the show notes. Or the email that announced this episode to download it. You can also follow me on Instagram and check out my link tree to get the download as well. Download it now, and you will be really fucking happy, and make wise use of your time.

It’s called the fertility mindset time finder. Now, when it comes to mindset and the excuse of time, here’s what you need to know. When you are not getting the result you want, doing all of the physical shit we do to get pregnant, your ass better be working overtime on that mind of yours. Plain and simple, few other things will matter more in the equation of your success.

I am telling you that fear and doubt are a mind virus more contagious and deadly than the bullshit the fear mongers tried to scare us with since 2020. That is a fact. Okay. Fear is a manipulator and that’s exactly what gets used all the time to scare the shit out of us. And especially on this journey, what is more important than investing time in your resilience, discernment, decision making, and faith?

Your laundry? Some mindless bullshit on Netflix? Or is it the same old garbage your boss has been spewing in your direction for years? Huh? Think about that. Think about how much time you utterly fucking waste doing shit to be liked and people pleasing. Think about how much time you waste saying yes to shit.

You want to say a roaring fuck no to. Think about how much time you waste being scared. Too scared to make any phone calls, send an email, join a program, find a new doctor, start your business that will finally make you some real money, tell your partner what you really need so they can actually fucking be there for you, and numbing out with busy work.

Think about it. Think about how much time we waste on that shit. Think. You could reclaim weeks, if not months, of your fucking life if you stop making the excuse that you don’t have time and become the woman who is in control of her time, invests it wisely, and uses it to build the one thing that will determine if she succeeds or fails in the end, and that is her mind.

Your mind. And your perception of your life, what you think, what you believe, all of these things that come together for mindset. Your mindset will determine your success or failure. Because it’s literally dictating what you eat, what you do, what you won’t do. It’s controlling everything. It doesn’t matter where you go, your mindset goes with you, which is why it is so critical.

Because here’s the nasty truth no one wants to talk about. And you should write this down. Your fear, doubt, negativity, limiting beliefs, and ultimate failure on this journey, if you’re not careful, if you don’t get your mind right, all require your agreement. Let me say that again. Your fear, doubt, negativity, limiting beliefs, and ultimate failure on this journey, All require your agreement.

All of those things need you to agree with them in order for them to have any power over you. You are only a failure if you consciously agree to be one. Does this make sense to you? This is why if you’re serious about succeeding on this journey, you can’t afford to not make time for your mind. You make time daily.

You keep your word daily. When you fuck up on your mindset work and miss, You find a way to make it up, but this is not about perfection because perfection is not required. You do it for love. Love for yourself, love for your baby, love for your partner, love for the family you dream of, love for the women two generations from now who will look back on your story and be inspired by it, knowing that great great grandma didn’t take any shit from anyone and change the shape of the family tree.

Think about it. You taking the time now to work on you benefits your great granddaughters. You give women you will never meet the chance to live an entirely different existence. You exercise the demon of excuses from your family’s lineage, at least for a time, because those buggers are virulent and pernicious.

When you make time to work on your mindset, everyone in your life benefits. The women that go through my programs tell me all the time how not only do they change the way they think on this journey, the amazing side effect is that it touches so many other aspects of their lives. They see improvement in their work, their relationships, their businesses, they get promotions, they finally start eating and exercising in a way that feels good instead of punishing, they start living again.

Time is no fucking excuse. Things that are not adding to your life, making you better, helping you forge a way forward to this baby are taking from it. This is why discernment is key when it comes to time. Now, with all of this background, I’m going to give you an exercise that consists of three questions.

Be sure to follow along with the worksheet we created. Here goes, don’t overthink, just answer the fucking questions and trust your gut. And this is on the fertility mindset time finder. So, question one, what are the top five ways I currently squander my time or numb out? And look, no judgment here, as I said before, no judgment, just be honest.

I gave you some great examples earlier of the way that we squander our time with Netflix and numbing out. So what are your top five ways that you are currently squandering your time? Question two, what are three things I choose to delegate now? And I know the word delegate fucking darkens the halls of every corporate workplace.

But I want you to apply this principle like a billion dollar CEO when it comes to your life. Where are you wasting time on shit that is not moving you forward? Do you still clean your own house? Do you do your own laundry? Do you do your own groceries or for fuck’s sake are you having them delivered?

People tell some of the stupidest stories about getting help on, with these things, right? I can already hear it, Oh, I mean getting help with my laundry, that’s for rich people. It’s like, what? What are you talking about? How much do you actually think it costs to have somebody help you with your laundry?

Go look it up. It actually costs less than you think. But you know, here, here’s the thing. All of that comes from a mindset that will keep you stuck and spiraling in failure. Our lives today are very different than the lives of the people who came before us. Why use the yardstick that they used? Our lives are different, the pace at which we live is different, and you actually get to be awake and discerning about how you use your time today.

Hand off shit that doesn’t actually matter, okay? You wanna fold socks? Or do shit that helps you make a better choice so that next cycle you could actually get and stay pregnant, right? Wouldn’t you rather spend the time doing the stuff that’s actually going to move you forward on this journey? I mean, come the fuck on, alright?

You would probably pay 10, 000 times that to finally get to where you want to be on this journey, okay? Now, number three, if I consistently made time for my mindset, where could I be in six months? That’s a big one. If you actually stopped wasting your time on shit that doesn’t matter, buckled down, and started working on your mindset so you can finally see the opportunities all around you, get out of fear, negativity, and doubt, and believing more in your past than in the good that’s coming for you, where could you be in six months?

What kind of decisions? Would you be making? How different could your relationships be? What about the quality of your decisions? Mind matters. Thoughts, beliefs, actions, results. Can’t get around it. So there you have it, mamas. I hope you can see the fucking value we delivered today. Use this shit and change your fucking life.

Want more? The smartest thing you can do when you aren’t getting the results you want on this journey through your treatments, diets, lotions, and potions is get help with your mindset. Your success on this journey starts there. Be part of the magic that women from around the world are bringing to each one of their cycles.

By being part of my signature live group coaching program, my fearlessly fertile method is for women who intend to get pregnant in the next 12 months and say, hell yes, you’ve heard a lot of them here. You got to say hell yes to covering your bases. Because the mind and body work together. You don’t want to look back on this time in your life with regret.

I work with women who are committed to success to apply for your interview for this program. Go to my website, www.FromMaybeToBaby.com and apply for an interview there. My methodologies help women around the world make their mom dreams come true. Their results. Speak for themselves. We got the receipts, baby.

And if you don’t have a mindset for success in this journey, baby, you got a gaping hole in your strategy. Let’s fix that shit and set you up for success till next time. Change your mindset, change your results. Love this episode of the fearlessly fertile podcast. Subscribe now and leave an awesome review.

Remember the desire in your heart to be a mom is there because it was meant for you when it comes to your dreams. Keep saying hell yes.

Rosanne offers a variety of programs to help you on your fertility journey — from Self-study, to Live, to Private Coaching.