EP217 From “Unexplained” To A Happy Ending In Her Danish Love Story: Meet Mette

When Mette met and fell in love with her husband, they thought having a family would be pretty straightforward. Next thing they knew, they found themselves with one of the most confounding fertility diagnoses there is: “unexplained.” Learn WHAT Mette did to go from failed fertility treatments and miscarriage to the happy ending her Danish Love Story had been praying for! You will LOVE this!

Grab Rosanne’s “Miracle Mama Mette” Journal Page

Hey Gorgeous, if you want success on your fertility journey, you’ve got to have the mindset for it. It’s time to kick fear, negativity, doubt, shame, jealousy, and the whole clown car of low vibe fertility journey BS to the curb. I’m your host, Roseanne Austin, Fertility Mindset Master. Former prosecutor and recovering type A control freak perfectionist.

I use the power of mindset to get pregnant naturally and have my baby boy at 43, despite years of fertility treatment failure. I help women across the globe beat the odds on their fertility journey, just like I did. Get ready for a quick hit of confidence, joy, feminine badassery, and loads of hell yes for your fertility journey.

It’s time to get fearless, baby, fearlessly fertile. Let’s do this. Welcome to the Fearlessly Fertile Podcast, episode 217. From unexplained to a happy ending in her Danish love story. Meet Mette. Oh my lo I know you’ve been hearing me flap my jaw for the past few weeks, and, you know, it never ceases to amaze me how Another one of my Miracle Mamas will reach out and be like, I want to share my story and it’s like, perfect timing, lady!

You know, because it’s great to get content that is teaching you, but it’s also really important to feed your heart, feed your soul with these incredibly amazing stories of women overcoming. It really warms my heart every time a woman wants to share her story on my podcast, because you know, they do the programs, they read the books, and they see these incredible transformations in their lives, and it’s wonderful to me how generous they are in wanting to share, because they remember what it was like to be in the place where you’re just a listener as opposed to a guest.

So today you are going to be hearing this incredible story of my most beloved Metta. And when Metta came to me, she had been in a situation where she had met the love of her life. They thought having a family would be relatively straightforward. And then the next thing they knew they found themselves going down the rabbit hole of struggling with fertility.

And they had one of the most confounding fertility diagnoses there is out there, and that is of unexplained. So you’re going to hear about how Metta went through multiple failed fertility treatments, endured repeated miscarriage, but found in her heart that, you know, man, there was something that was missing.

And she came to me when she realized that that something was missing and she too was a listener of this podcast and read my, my work and was like, yeah, you know what, I really believe that this is the piece. And so you’re going to learn what Metta did to go from failed fertility treatments and miscarriage to the happy ending her Danish love story had been praying for.

So I really hope that you pay really close attention to the beautiful nuggets of wisdom that Meta is going to be sharing. Download the journal page that we have created for you to go along with this episode. You know, we have, over the past months, taken an active Effort and really engaged in creating high quality content for you, giving you the tools that, that really take passive listening to a podcast into something that’s actionable.

So if you haven’t already download the journal page that goes along with this episode, it’s in the show notes. It’s also in my link tree on Instagram. If you’re following me there and you don’t take the time, one of the most powerful ways that we learn is through story and Metta is blessing us with hers today.

Here is my conversation with the brave, amazing, beautiful, and all around kick ass Danish rock star, Metta. Hi, Rosanne! How are you? I’m great, thank you. I am so excited that we’re having this conversation. We’re gonna jump right in, my darling woman, because I know you are busy, and I can’t wait to hear your Your recitation of the story.

So we’ll start there. So why don’t you start off by sharing with the women listening, how you found yourself on this journey? Okay. Well, um, yeah, five years ago I met my husband. We actually been in kindergarten together and then had a couple of years in high school and then we went separate after that.

And so we haven’t been in touch for 16 years. And then all of a sudden he commented on something I posted on Facebook and we started chatting and one thing led to another. And yeah, after three months I moved. So that was pretty quick, but it was like, I was madly in love with him. So it was only the right thing to do.

So I moved across the country. I was living in Copenhagen and he was living up north and. Three, four months went by and we were like, okay, we want to start a family. We want to get married. We had, you know, normally you take this after some years, but also we had a, we had an age where you, you, you know, you know what you want, you know, you want the family, you know, you want to get married and okay, let’s just have the talk and.

Okay. So I dropped every protection that we used and we’re like, okay, this is going to happen. Like, of course, my husband also has a son from earlier. So you were like, okay, yeah, it will be fine. Like just drop the pills and everything will work out. Obviously it didn’t. And after in Denmark, we have this. We pay taxes to the welfare system, so we can actually get help if you have problems trying to conceive, you can get help from, uh, from the system and they give you like these three tries with the egg retrieval and.

So, uh, the only thing is that if you’re under the age of 35, you have to been trying yourself for a year. And if you’re older than that, uh, half a year. So we went to the doctor and like, nothing is happening. And then it, and half a year went by and nothing happens. And she was like, okay, well, let’s, let’s try to take.

Let’s see, uh, how you’re doing. And we went through the blood test, uh, of course from, uh, my husband as well. And they couldn’t find anything wrong. We, uh, we got straight to their. Oh, what’s it called? I lost the word. Uh, where you, where you, not the IVF, but the before where you just take the sperm and, oh, IUI.

Yeah. Thank you. Thank you. And we tried that three times, nothing happened. And then we went to the IVF and I got pregnant in the, in the first round, but lost it in week seven. And It was during also during Corona, and there was a lot of waiting. So we actually went to a private hospital because we were tired of all the weight.

And in the public hospital, you can’t, you can’t make, be sure to get a space every month. So you sometimes you wait maybe three months and, uh, it was really stressful. So we bought some free trials in the private clinic. And they changed the procedure and we were like, full of new hope. So like, okay, now it’s going to happen for sure.

This is, this is the way. And the first one I got pregnant miscarriage again, and we seven, then we were like, okay, what’s going on. And then we had a lot of tests after negative tests. Like my body was just like, I feel like my body was shutting down. Like, not now, this is not, I’m, I’m full of all the hormones and everything you’re, all the pressure you’re putting on me.

And and I was like, I was in a really stressful period of time there. And I was like, what do I do? Where do I go with all of these thoughts and everything that’s filling up in my head? And what were some of the thoughts that what’s wrong with me? That was really the big one. Why is this not working? I had a thought that, okay, if we go to IVF, then it will happen.

I will get the baby, but yeah, everything will succeed. And then it didn’t. I like, we had seven egg retrievals and, and I was just sort of losing hope. Like, am I ever going to be a mom? And it was, I was really turning it inside, you know, really, um, being frustrated on myself, on my body and really had a hard time.

And then I started listening to your podcast. Ah, yeah, I think you, yeah, you popped up on Instagram or something. And then I was like, what’s that? And it was just what I needed at that time. It was just like, Meant to be that I saw this, uh, on Instagram from you, because it was, I was just really in this dark place and there was exactly what I needed.

Someone who was all the success stories from, from the women’s who just keep me in the loop and okay. There’s still hope. And then I had this, I had this feeling that I needed to contact you. I need, I needed. I wanted more, it was like, um, I needed help. Yeah. In my mindset, because it was way off and I, I couldn’t find my own way back.

And so I needed help. And then I, what made you want to do that though? Metta, because you could have easily said like before, Oh, IVF and this is going to fix me. I’m going to be. Just fine. Like what made you look and say, you know what, my mind has something to do with this. I need to do something about these thoughts and the suffering that I’m creating for myself.

I think it was some, some different things. It was, uh, both my body telling me that this is not the way to do it. It was like my body telling my mind that this is, You are actually doing harmful things to me, to your body, and this needs to be a safe place where a baby can grow and you know, where, where there’s a protection and love and all of this.

And I just had a feeling that, that my body was actually, my body was telling me this is not the way. So that was my, my, yeah, my body and my soul instead of my head leading the way. Isn’t that crazy Metta? I mean, like. I hear this so often from women that, you know, especially women like you, smart, driven, logical, you know, this kind of thing is not something you would typically consider, but you did.

Yeah. So tell us what happened next, because I actually remember. The conversation that we had, I, I will, for some reason, I have this freaky ability to remember the first conversation I have with every woman. But tell me what that was like for you, because this is very American. It is. Yeah. And, and, and it was what I needed because in, in, in Denmark, we are more like conservative and maybe hold them back and not as outgoing.

We can be when, when, you know, us really, really well, but I needed like the no bullshit. I needed someone who tell me. You can do this, you know, really to, to not try to pack it up in like statistics and I needed someone to believe in me and helping me believe in myself. Yeah. So that’s awesome. So, so you get into the program.

What were some of the things that you started noticing about you? I got more relaxed was really the first thing. And. Actually, the community with all the other women, it was really helpful to have this feeling of, okay, I’m not alone in this, and my thoughts are not Crazy. And everything I’m doing is not crazy.

It’s like a lot of other women are in the same place and have the same thoughts and the same. Yeah. Everything. So it really helped me with not feeling alone in the progress and not feeling weird. Ah, yeah, yeah. Well, and so. What were some of the things that you saw beginning to change for you? Because I got to see it as an observer, and I’m curious to see what you think the changes were.

First of all, believing in myself was really, that was the thing that I really, I really lost my self esteem through the progress. And, and also the belief in my body, the ability that my body could do this. And that was a huge change for me. It was really believing in the, that, that this is going to happen, believing in, in, in that I’m actually going to be a mom and believing in my body.

And that is building up the trust to my body again, that I can do this. Yeah. And it’s so different when you’re surrounded by other really smart women trying to do the same thing, because You could have easily said meta, you know, I’ll just listen to this podcast. I’ll read this crazy lady’s book, but it’s different, isn’t it?

Yeah, it is. It really goes under your skin. Like. It’s not just, I feel like I’m more connected to the progress and more into it because of the weeks we had together. And, and I felt really that, that you listened, like, like you, you really, I felt, it felt like you get, you got me, you know, you understood where I was coming from.

And, And also, you, you were so good to ask me the right questions so I couldn’t hide. Ah, that’s right. There’s no hiding in this program, Meta. No way. I have a no woman left behind policy. I will come for you. Mm hmm. So, that’s, that’s interesting. And so, okay, so by this time, you had seven egg retrievals. You had had a couple miscarriages at seven weeks.

And so what happened next for you? So you’re doing this program and then what were the next steps that you were taking? Actually, we had, we had one egg retrieval left in the, the private clinic, uh, just after I started the program with you. And we did that. And that was actually the first time I was feeling like, I’m not sure they’re doing it, you know, the right way.

How dare you Metta, question the experts. Yeah. And that was really a big change, which really, um, I’ve been through like these really long IVFs where you had to like these two months where you have to be on hormones to keep your eggs down and then have to boost them afterwards. And it was really, really tough for my body.

And When we finished at the private clinic, we have, we got back to the, um, to the first clinic. And then I said to them, listen up, I’ve been trying this so many times. It’s so, so, so hard for my body. I just want to do the, the more. Was it not safe, but you know, I want to do the, the less IVF with, not with all the hormones, but just the, the milder one.

Yes. Because you haven’t, we haven’t tried that enough. Don’t try it once. So I want to try that. And then because that feels better for me. And they were like, Oh, but are you sure? Because maybe there won’t be any eggs and maybe there won’t be a, only be a few eggs. I’m like, I’m sure this is what we’re going to do.

And they were like, okay, we’ll try it. And I never had more eggs. Then this one time it was like, normally I had like five, six, six, this time I had 12. It wasn’t just a couple of more. It was 12. We’re like, are you kidding me? Well, I mean, think about this method, like think about what you were saying. You’re noticing these changes in yourself.

You’re becoming more relaxed. You’re actually becoming more bold and clear about what you want. And so when you go back to that other clinic. You tell them what you want, even though they doubt it. You look at the result you created. Yeah. And we had the first try there and the, the egg didn’t, I had a negative, uh, pregnancy test.

And they filmed at that time, they were like, okay, maybe it’s your, your immune system. So we want to try to give you, uh, something for that. And then, and also a lot of progesterone, because maybe it’s to hold the, you know, the egg to make sure it’s staying there. So they filled me with hormones and I was like, no, no, no, no, no, no.

And it didn’t work. Then we had the last, last egg that was actually good out of the 12. And I was like, we’re going to do this all natural, like a natural cyclist and no hormones, nothing. And they were like, okay, let’s try it. Oh yeah. But they were also like, are you sure it’s the last, last egg? And I sure want to do that.

Yes. I need to do that. And now I’m pregnant. You met it. Like, it’s just blows me away. How many weeks pregnant are you? 23. I mean, here you are going from these IVF failures. Miscarriage, all of these thoughts in your head, you know, causing you to wonder, why is this happening to me? When am I ever going to be a mom?

Is this ever going to happen? To you becoming more connected, more clear, more relaxed. And speaking your mind about what you want, and how dare you tell the clinic what you want, and now you are 23 weeks pregnant. Exactly. And, you know, and that’s insane to me, Metta, because you did this fairly quickly after the program.

Mm hmm. Because I remember you messaged me and I’m like, whaaat? Yeah, I did. I had some time, like, after, um, the last trial we had at the private clinic. And then before we went back to the first clinic, I had some time off. Me and my husband, we went to Italy. Like, you know, drinking, eating, doing all of this, not thinking about baby.

You know, I just needed time off. We did that for three months and it was amazing. Well, think about that metal. Like, I mean, you could, cause so many women fall into the crazy and the idea of taking three months off to go to Italy and drink and enjoy your fucking life. People freak out about that. You are demonstrating that you really made a shift in the way you were thinking and you weren’t living in lack and scarcity.

Exactly. Yeah. There was the huge change, like not living in fear and negativity, actually living my life. So not, not so yeah, it was, uh, I had, I had a feeling that I was just surviving, not living. You know, and that’s really such a powerful point that you’re making because a lot of women get into this idea.

Then in order to be successful on this journey, you have to suffer. You’re living proof of the exact opposite. Yeah. It was when I actually stopped the suffering, the change happened and it’s not possible overnight. Of course it’s, it’s, it’s hard work. You did the work, Meta. I mean, like you came to the coaching calls ready to learn, like you weren’t, I remember our first conversation, you were not dicking around when I said, is it a hell yes or hell no.

You went for it because you were serious and you knew that things had to be different. And it wasn’t just that things had to be different. It was that you had to be different. Yeah, I knew that something inside of me had to change to make the change that I was wanting, you know? And if I, I wanted to also like, Like if a baby needs to come down to me and live here, I need to, to create like the environment, the space, everything.

So it’s attractive. Yeah. I was so stressful. And so being so hard on myself that it wasn’t like my entire body was. Not ready for a baby, you know, and it’s so stunning to me, you know, one of the biggest changes that you were describing and, and, and I saw it in you was, you know, here’s the clinic and you look, they’re well intentioned, they’re kind people, they, they, they know what they know, but you know what, you know, and when you told them what you wanted, their approach was, are you sure, you know, so they’re coming from a place of lack and scarcity and fear, but you were strong enough to stand up and say, Hey, Yes, I am sure about what I want.

Yeah, and, and that’s such a powerful thing to actually feel that this is what I want. And then go for it. I mean, it, you know, it sounds so simple. Yeah, it does. It sounds so freaking simple. It does. But you have to, you know, have yourself with everything inside of you. You know, all your cells, your, your soul, your everything has to be.

In line, you know, it has to be with you in this because then it, or else it would be like a decision from your head. Right. Yeah. I’m sure you remember me saying neck down, like down. It’s from your neck up is where fear lives. Neck down is where your baby’s going to live. Wow. So what would you, I mean, from where you are today, because.

I would venture to guess that you’re still using these tools throughout your pregnancy because for some reason, everybody wants, when you’re pregnant, everyone wants to tell you their crazy story about pregnancy or all this nutty stuff. Have you been using it? Yeah, a lot, especially in the early weeks of pregnancy, because it wasn’t so much that you had trouble getting pregnant per se for you.

It was staying pregnant. Yeah. And so, so also when I had the positive pregnancy test, then the first thing was fear and I was like, no way I’m not going that way. And this time when it actually stayed, we only took a blood test, which would no pregnancy tests at home. We took one blood test and then only one blood test, not like a blood test every third day or to see how it’s.

I was totally leaning in to my body and had this trust that, okay, this is it. My body knows what to do. I’m trusting the progress. Meta, did you have a brain transplant? I mean, it was crazy. I mean, because look, you had had two miscarriages prior and at week seven, you could have gone into a really dark place.

I was really listening to all of the sessions I had with you, reading your book, you know, doing all of this, really, really leaning into doing all these good things for myself. Like what, what makes me happy besides that I want a baby, but doing good things like seeing my girlfriends, going to a spa, you know, really, really taking care of me.

And it helped me in the progress. This is incredible, Mehta, because, you know, you are demonstrating that in fact you can have it all. You can have your beautiful Danish love story. You can find success on this journey. You can still have a life. You can have All of this incredible work that you do. I mean, I’m going to check you for a pulse.

You’re actually alive and it worked. It did. How does it feel to have, I mean, how does it really feel if you could describe it just for you, how does it feel? To have done this for yourself, because at some level, that’s exactly what you did. You had to decide that your dream was important enough that you weren’t going to give up.

How does that feel? Like the biggest love for myself I could ever imagine. It was really taking care of myself, but in a, in a way I never imagined would be possible full of love for myself. It’s incredible, Meta, because you never made any excuses. That was one of the coolest things I remember about you.

Like it was just, you were not sorry for wanting what you wanted. And you made no excuses. So what would you, I mean, if there’s a few things that you would share with the women listening, like if you would give them a couple of pieces of pieces of advice, because you started listening to this podcast. So you remember what it was like to sit and listen to these other women.

So now this is your chance. I mean, can you believe we’re having this conversation? No, actually I can. It’s crazy to be here. It’s. Oh, yeah. It’s amazing. So you were a listener and now you’re a guest. So what are some things that you would want women all over the world to keep in mind as they live their journey?

Trust yourself. Follow your heart and your soul. And Never give up. Really. If your heart’s in it and you know it is, never give up. It’s so simple, but it’s also so profound. And just think about the way that you’re going to be a mother to this child. Think about the way you’re going to parent this child, knowing what you know now.

Yeah. Yeah. And that’s actually a thing I’ve been thinking about a lot in these past few weeks, is being on this journey, even though it’s been so tough. And I wouldn’t, it has given me so much that I, I wouldn’t have, I wouldn’t have explored all of this about myself and be the woman I am today. If I haven’t been in this, if I haven’t been through this progress with you and, and with myself.

Uh, what would be an entire other place and I’m, I’m thinking also like, uh, it’s exactly how, how I’m, I’m going to give that to my baby. That is so beautiful. Meta. Well, I am so honored and excited. I’m honored to be, have been by your side and I’m excited for you and the life that you’re creating. And I’m just so grateful that you jumped on with us today.

So thank you. Thank you so much for saying for everything. I can’t thank you enough. For all the things that you’ve listened to and you’re coaching me in and all the cheering. I love it. I love it. Well, you know, because I lived it too, Metsa, like it’s so important, you know, and one of the most powerful ways that we learn is through other people’s story and being able to see that we can do it too.

So I’m so grateful for your generosity and I cannot wait to see your baby pictures. Yay! Me neither. I know. I know. We’ll go and enjoy the rest of your day, my love. I mean, the greatest. Like thing, you know, that I get out of this is seeing you and all the other ladies so freaking happy and because you deserve it.

So thank you so much, Meta. Thank you so much for saying my loves. I mean, seriously, come on. Her kindergarten sweetheart comes back into her life and now she’s pregnant having a baby. I mean. I hope you loved Metta as much as I do. And you took so much from her story because I know that Metta would tell you that if she did it, so can you.

So if you want to learn what I taught Metta, my fearlessly fertile method program is for women who intend to get pregnant in the next 12 months and say hell yes to covering their bases, mind and body because the mind and body work together, baby. If you haven’t figured that out yet. Boom, mindset so often proves to be the missing piece.

And if your heart is set on getting pregnant in the next 12 months, cause Meta did it within months of finishing my program, go to my website, www.FromMaybeToBaby.com and apply for an interview there. My methodologies help women around the world make their mom dreams come true. Their results speak for themselves.

If you don’t have a mindset for success in this journey, baby, you gotta keep it all in your strategy. Let’s fix that shit and set you up for success. Success leaves clues, baby. Till next time. Change your mindset, change your results. Love this episode of the Fearlessly Fertile podcast? Subscribe now and leave an awesome review.

Remember, the desire in your heart to be a mom is there because it was meant for you. When it comes to your dreams, keep saying hell yes.

Rosanne offers a variety of programs to help you on your fertility journey — from Self-study, to Live, to Private Coaching.