EP72 What to DO When Feeling Disconnected From the Dream

Do you ever have days when you feel so disconnected from your dream of being a Mom it seems like some misty, impossibility? I’m going to teach you a powerful exercise to get back into the REALITY that being a Mom was meant for you. Make sure you have a pen and your journal.

Hey gorgeous, if you want success on your fertility journey, you’ve got to have the mindset for it. It’s time to kick fear, negativity, doubt, shame, jealousy, and the whole clown car of low vibe fertility journey BS to the curb. I’m your host, Roseanne Austin, Fertility Mindset Master. Former prosecutor and recovering type A control freak perfectionist.

I use the power of mindset to get pregnant naturally and have my baby boy at 43, despite years of fertility treatment failure. I help women across the globe beat the odds on their fertility journey, just like I did. Get ready for a quick hit of confidence, joy, feminine badassery, and loads of hell yes for your fertility journey.

It’s time to get fearless baby, fearlessly fertile. Let’s do this. Welcome to the Fearlessly Fertile Podcast, Episode 72. What to do when you’re feeling disconnected from the dream. Loves, I wanted to come at you this week with something short and sweet and super practical. I’ve been sharing loads of really powerful, at times intense content.

And so I want to get us back to basics, really focus on what you can do in the moment when you feel disconnected from the dream and that dream is your dream of being a mom because so much of what we do on this journey is go, go, go, do, do, do. And sometimes there is a rather big lag time between all of the work we do in the name of having this baby.

And the actual result. And what can happen when we get really stuck in that is we feel disconnected from the dream. It’s like, man, what am I doing all of this for? What is this whole mom thing I’m trying to do? It can seem like an entirely different universe. So what I want to do here is help you get really grounded.

And grounded is something that is worth its weight in gold on this journey. And the process is really simple because we spend so much time in our heads spinning. Reliving the past, what if ing ourselves to death. That I really want to redirect all of that brain power to an idea that we get really disconnected from.

And it is simply this. Who is this mom you desire to be? Really think about that question. Who is this mom you desire to be with our brains racing a million miles an hour, freaking out about the past, worrying about the future. Feeling like we’re overwhelmed. We’ve got to get back to the core thing that drives us on this journey.

Who is this mom you desire to be? That’s what we all are secretly desiring all the time. Right? But we are so disconnected from it that when we don’t have a real handle, when we cannot be conversant. In the topic of who is this mom we desire to be, it can seem like everything we’re doing is happening in a vacuum.

It doesn’t really matter, and we’re, we’re at a point where, man, we should just give up because we feel so fucking disconnected from all of that. So, we’re gonna correct that right here, right now. And obviously, if you’re listening to this while you’re driving a car or operating heavy machinery, Wait till you get to a place where you have some paper, a pen, your journal.

I don’t care if it’s a napkin, uh, somebody’s sleeve. This is so important that you really got to take the time and do this. And the exercise this week is going to be really simple. At the top of the page, I want you to write, who is the mom I desire to be? Who is this woman? Question mark. And I want you to use that Big, beautiful, bold, creative, inspired brain of yours to write this out.

Who is this woman? What does she want? Who does she choose to be? What does she desire for her children? And I want you to make her a three dimensional character. Who is this mom you desire to be? And that’s not to suggest she’s not you now, but I want you to flesh this out. Like, are you the mom that’s wearing cute Lululemons, you know, carrying a cold brew and jumping into her Range Rover?

I don’t know. That was certainly my image. Like, that was the image I had created in my mind. But for so many years on my journey, I couldn’t connect to that. That seemed like it was somebody else. Because all I was doing was quote unquote failing, and there were turds around every corner. But what really helped me build my confidence, what really helped me build my belief, is going back to this image that I was creating.

It was not yet my reality, but what I was choosing to do was get grounded in that. Because what we tend to do is get grounded in the scary statistics, we get grounded in the failures, we get grounded in the naysaying, we get grounded in what’s not happening. And all that’s going to do is take you straight to shit town.

You don’t want to do that. The way you keep your energy up, the way you stay connected to the dream, even in spite of scary statistics and your current circumstances, is you get grounded in the image of who is this woman, who is this mother you desire to be. And I want you to spend a lot of time on this.

You know, you may try to blow this off, do it in five minutes. I want you to make this like a love letter to the mom you desire to be. She’s you. She’s just not you yet, but this is why you’ve got to become so close to her in your heart. In your mind’s eye, with all of your imagination. Because even when the shit is hitting the fan in your life, if you can get grounded in her, she will become your reality.

When you spend enough time with that bitch, she will seem more real than what is going on around you. Now, there may be part of you that says, Ah, that’s fucking delusional, why would I do that? Well, If you do that, you’re in good company. Think about Michael Phelps, Steph Curry, Serena Williams, Venus Williams, anyone who has accomplished anything first accomplished it in their head.

They created the image of what they desired, and that is what drove them. You can Google any Michael Phelps interview, and he talks about how before he sticks a toe in the pool, he is swimming in his mind. He sees the strokes. He feels the strokes. And he sees himself winning world records and doing all kinds of amazing things.

And what we’re doing here is instead of just sitting and imagining that, I want to slow your brain down even more, because what happens is, you know, when we’re out of practice or we don’t do visualization enough, we start going off and we’ll start visualizing all the crazy shit. We’ll visualize the disasters, we’ll visualize the past.

What I want you to do is put pen to paper, and the reason why we do that is that’s literally slowing your brain down. Think about how much slower you have to move handwriting something. It’s slowing your brain down, and this is great because when you slow down, my loves, you can get textures, colors, nuance, characteristics, and all kinds of goodies that you wouldn’t get if you were just Imagining it in your mind, the process of slowing yourself down is like slowly enjoying a luscious meal as opposed to roller skating through In N Out Burger, just grabbing whatever it is that you can and shoving it in your mouth.

That’s how different these things can be. Savor the meal, savor the image, savor this journey that you’re on, my loves. So, who is this mom you desire to be? And create this image. Write it out. Longhand. Yes, longhand. Any of y’all who are thinking right now, can’t I type this out of my computer? No. I want you to go pterodactyl old school.

You’re lucky I’m not suggesting you get a clay tablet. Okay? Pen, paper, journal, sleeve, it doesn’t matter. Just go with this. Set the timer on your phone. Give yourself 20 minutes. It’ll be the coolest 20 minutes that you’ve ever had truly on this journey. If you do this right, you’re going to come face to face with this mom that you desire to be.

What does she love? How does she get to work in the morning outside of a pandemic? Like what is she doing on the weekends? How does she interact with her children? What does she make her children for breakfast? Does she make her children breakfast? You know, how does she interact with her partner? How often does she see her friends?

What kind of a business does she run? You know, what is her profession? Get really clear about that and really make it a point to revisit what you write. Because even though this may sound like some bullshit exercise, I’m telling you, my darlings, When you get this in your bones and when you get this in your heart, you will look back on this and this is literally the blueprint of the mom you will become.

When I look back on all of the things I imagined, written, otherwise, and what I actually created in my life because I was willing to create the image, write it out, see it in my heart, live from that place, not my current circumstances. The reality that I created was 10, 000 times better. Okay. So this is worth the time.

This is worth the exercise. Don’t roll your eyes. Fucking do it. Set the timer for 20 minutes. You will be so glad you did. And just think about it, love. Think about where you could be 12 months from now. If you got your mindset on board, what if you had the tools, the strategies and the fucking skillset to live your journey this way?

It is completely possible, love, and yes, you can learn it. My Fearlessly Fertile Method program is for women who intend to get pregnant in the next 12 months and say hell yes to covering their bases, mind, and body, so you don’t have to look back on this time with regret. To apply for your interview for this groundbreaking program, go to my website, www.FromMaybeToBaby.com, and apply for an interview with me there. This program is for women who are committed to success.

My methodologies help women around the world make their mom dreams come true. Their results speak for themselves. You too can make what you write on that piece of paper in your journal on someone’s sleeves.

You can make that your reality. Because love, if you don’t have a mindset for success on this journey, you’ve got a gaping hole in your strategy and let’s fix that shit. Till next time. Change your mindset. Change your results. Love this episode of The Fearlessly Fertile Podcast. Subscribe now and leave an awesome review.

Remember the desire in your heart to be a mom is there because it was meant for you. When it comes to your dreams, keep saying hell yes.

Rosanne offers a variety of programs to help you on your fertility journey — from Self-study, to Live, to Private Coaching.