EP98 She Traded Obsession for Success

Diana had no idea fertility would be an “issue” for her, but on the heels of a heart breaking miscarriage, her world was turned upside down. Fear that she would never be a Mom, took over her life. Learn how this gifted educator went from daily tears and havoc in her marriage to the peace and confidence that comes with surrender. In doing so, she found her path to success.

Transcript:
Hey Gorgeous, if you want success on your fertility journey, you’ve got to have the mindset for it. It’s time to kick fear, negativity, doubt, shame, jealousy, and the whole clown car of low vibe fertility journey BS to the curb. I’m your host, Roseanne Austin, Fertility Mindset Master. Former prosecutor and recovering type A control freak perfectionist.

I use the power of mindset to get pregnant naturally and have my baby boy at 43, despite years of fertility treatment failure, I help women across the globe beat the odds on their fertility journey. Just like I did get ready for a quick hit of confidence, joy, feminine badassery, and loads of hell. Yes.

For your fertility journey, it’s time to get fearless, baby, fearlessly fertile. Let’s do this. Welcome to the fearlessly fertile podcast episode 98. She traded obsession for success. Hey loves. I am super delighted to be here with you this week, sharing a truly inspirational story with you. Now, if you’ve been following my work, read either of my books, or have listened to this podcast for any period of time, you know that I serve lovably type A control freaky professional women all over the world.

And this week’s interview is going to be no different. You are going to meet my beloved, beloved Diana. And you’re gonna hear how this truly extraordinary woman gives back to her community as an educator for special needs children. And how she found herself on this journey rather suddenly. She didn’t think she was going to be having any issues, but on the heels of a heartbreaking miscarriage, her world was turned upside down.

Her thoughts of being a mom went from hearts and daisies to full on panic. So you’re going to hear how this woman who was super committed to covering her bases, mind and body, literally went to work. You’re going to hear how this woman went from crying every single day, driving hundreds of miles and hours a week for acupuncture, even seeking out, this is going to be such a great story, a sober Dora to try to fix her.

You’re really beginning to understand. That the key to her success on this journey was going to be her. You’re also going to hear how she breathed new life into her relationship. And instead of letting this journey drive her and her husband apart, how they came together and really decided to work as a couple toward their success.

She literally traded her future tripping and worrying about when this baby was going to get here. For the peace and calm that comes with surrender. If you would love to learn how you do that, listen up to my conversation with the amazing Diana. I cannot like just when we, before we technically started this, like I was saying, like, can you believe that we’re having this conversation right now?

I know. I just, I mean, I, I never thought I’d be here when I, you know, before I started your program, I just, I, I couldn’t envision it. Because it was taken away from me. So I, I, I was just had it in my head. This is never going to happen. And, you know, so as we get started, why don’t you, why don’t you tell the ladies listening just a little bit about like, you know, kind of your world and how you found yourself on this journey?

Okay. So we started when I was 35, you know, we had just gotten married and I was kept pushing that I wanted to have a baby, wanted to have a baby, but he was very old school where he’s like, no, I have to marry you and then have a baby. That’s just, I guess the, for him, like the traditional Mexican way. I was like, Oh, I love him.

He’s chivalrous. He’s chivalrous. So we got married and then he said, okay, we’re going to try. And to be honest, I never thought about having some bumps in our fertility journey. I never thought about it. And my primary doctor, cause I would tell her, I’m like, I’m getting old. I want children. Like I’m kind of concerned.

And she said, she goes, well, aren’t you Mexican? And I said, yes. And she’s like. You guys are like super fertile. I would not worry about it. So it kind of put me at ease and I was like, okay, I never thought of it after that. I’m like, okay, we’re going to get pregnant. It’s going to be easy. And first try we got pregnant and I was like, Oh my God, it worked.

Everybody was right. And then, you know, two months into the pregnancy, we, we lost the baby. And then that’s when it hit me that, okay. This is not as easy as everyone said it was going to be. And so I try to have that momentum, like, okay, it’s going to be easy. Again, we did it the first time without thinking it happened.

We can do it again. And it didn’t work and then the next month it didn’t work. And then we lost the baby in August. So by let’s see, November, I started reading on what the hell I can do to get pregnant, to improve my chances. I tried acupuncture, which was costing me like almost 200 a session. And we were going every week, the first month we were doing it twice a week.

And so I say, okay, this is not working. Even though they had a good track record. I’m like, it’s not working. So then of course the whole Mexican community around us said, okay, go to a Salvadoran. Um, I don’t know if you.

I’m from Guam. I know that we have a version of that. I know exactly what you’re talking about. Yes. I was like, I don’t know. And, and it, they’re hard to find. Cause it’s kind of like on the down, they do it out of their house and everything. So I was like, Oh my God, I’m just desperate. So at the same time, I’m looking for this.

So we said, okay, let’s just go to our fertility clinic using our insurance. And they said, it’s going to cost you a heavy penny. Your insurance doesn’t cover everything. And at this point I was becoming desperate. And I said, I just, let’s just do it. So they order all these tests and exams and everything, and we go through it.

And then. We, I did that one with the saline water where I just leak water and no one told me that was going to happen because at the same time they did that other procedure where they put the, I guess the iodine in you to see the, your fallopian tubes are closed or open. So it was back to back and it just felt super uncomfortable.

I had to take time off work. And, you know, I was telling my husband, I’m like, I feel so weird because I’m leaky water and we’re walking to the car. This is all happening while COVID was going on and we just didn’t care. We were, you know, it’s a time when we weren’t wearing masks just before everything shut down.

So, uh, while we’re waiting for the results for that, um, we found a Salvador that someone said, Oh, she went and she got pregnant right away. So I was like, Oh my God, this one works. So I drive out with my best friend. Cause my husband’s like, I have to work. So my best friend’s like, I’m going to go with you because those things are kind of scary.

Like, have you ever seen one? I said, no, I don’t even know what we’re going through. So when you drive out almost two hours out of LA for this Salvador. And we get there and it’s nothing but women like myself of all different backgrounds, all different colors. I mean, it was a two hour wait of just women trying to get pregnant.

Yes. And, um, you know, she, you know, she sold teas, she sold everything that you might need. to help with your reproductive area. And so I, you know, sitting there, I started talking to other women and they were saying like, Oh, I have PCOS. I have this, I have that. We’ve been trying. I’m going through IVF. I’m trying to improve my chances.

And so I’m looking around and I’m like, Oh my God, like, It’s kind, it was kind of overwhelming to be like, you know, this, this is real. Cause I’ve never really, like I said, in the very beginning, I didn’t think I would have a bump in my road, but it just hit me. I’m like, oh my God, she’s been trying for three years.

She’s been trying for four years. Like, is this ever going to happen for me? So finally we get in there and she, she’s like, Oh, your uterus is on top of your bladder. I got to pop it in there. And I was like, wait, and before I can even say anything, she presses it and you just hear a pop. And I was like, Oh my God.

And my friend was like, did that hurt? I said, no, but it just, it was an awkward sensation, I guess. To hear the pop. And then afterwards, she’s like, you have to take care of yourself. Where a Faja, which is like a wrap where this is. So there I am with like, you know, the whole Faja and drinking these teas that she told me to drink.

And I was just like, Oh my God, I can’t believe I’m actually doing this, but whatever, I’m, you know, I’m trying to get to my baby. I will do it. Um, and then we get the results back and she said the same thing that my, um, uterus was tilted dramatically. So then I’m thinking, Oh my God, well, what, what can we do?

And they were ready to say, okay, we might have to have surgery to correct it. And I said, Oh my God. So I started panicking, but on the brighter side, she said that also one of my fallopian tubes was sort of closed. She said your other one is wide open and I don’t think, I have no doubt that you can get pregnant using, doing an IUI.

So they tested my husband, they looked at the follicles, she said that we’re, we’re both super fertile. That are, that my age count for my age was at the age of someone who was still in their late twenties. Oh wow! Yeah. So she told my husband like you hit the jackpot with her. She’s got a lot of eggs. Um, now at this point you have to take these certain vitamins to make sure that they’re still good quality.

So I did it. And so we were scheduled to do the IUI, but it was the week after that Friday, they shut down everything. So I started to get a little bit more calmed down and relaxed when they have scheduled the IUI. But when they shut everything down, that’s when again, my mind just went, well, you would call future tripping.

Oh my God, we’re not going to do this. What else am I going to do? Like, how long are you closing for? And I mean, I was just panicking. I think I was calling every single doctor to see what else I can do at home. And they all said the same thing, which is now that I think about it, I’m like, Oh my God, why was I asking that question?

Just continue to try naturally. There’s nothing else you can do. No more acupuncture, no more going to the salvadora. That was just, everything was closed. So I was kind of bummed and I think between the March and when I first started your program, which was like late April, I, so it was like, like almost two months, I was freaking out.

I was crying like every single day and you know, it just, it was starting to wear on my husband because I was also like, I’m ovulating, like we need to do it now. And it’s just, it started not to become fun anymore. It was just more like, we have to get this done. And then that’s when I was, I think I was on Facebook when.

your book came out and like I said at this point I was like desperate and I was reading everything that I could read and when I read your your story and I went on your website also and you said you know schedule a meeting I was like fuck yes I am.

Oh man I love it, I love it. And then that’s how we met. I know and it’s such a like You know, when I, when I think about it, you know, I remember our very first conversation, it was, it’s still very clear in my head. And I’m like, this woman’s not playing games. Yeah, I was determined. I think I even cried during our session.

I’m like, I’m trying everything. Nothing’s working. I know. I know. Well, so then let’s talk about that because, you know, I mean, obviously you’re down because if you’re going to a Sobra Dora, like you’re, you’re willing to try some crazy shit, but like, what was it to you like about this mindset piece that caught your attention?

Like, because you could have just, I mean, that’s, that’s why you’re. I love your story. I love all of this truth that’s coming out for you because you could have easily blown it off. You could have said, I’ll just wait, you know, I’ll, I’ll just take these vitamins, but there was something in you that said, I’m giving it my all.

So tell us about that. Yeah, I think, um, I’ve always been that, you know, well, I’m a teacher, so I’m always. the planner. I’m always the one that if I set goals, I have to achieve it. That’s just how I’ve always been. And sometimes it drives people crazy. It could drive my husband crazy. But I just knew that I’m going to be a mom and I’m going to do everything possible.

Even I had even at that time said, you know, fuck this, we’re just going to do IVF. Even though a lot of people were saying, you’re jumping the gun, hold on, like it’ll come. And I was just like, nope. I just wanted to get to point A to point B, you know, as quick as possible. Just. I think, I think what was pushing me to keep going was that, that time that I hated the biological clock, like I’m going to be 37, I’m going to be, and it was just, it was freaking me out.

And I think when I finally decided to like call you and, and see this mindset is because it started to, I think my, my overachievements was getting to my husband and he was just like, You need to calm down because at that point we started to fight. He was letting me take the lead and he was willing to support me on whatever I needed.

But what I had the list in my head was just too long for him. And he said, you need to calm down. And I was like, how can I calm down? This is, you know, like. You know, this is what happens when you made me wait to get married and you took so long to propose to me and that all that started coming out of me.

And I was like, Ooh, that’s, that’s not good. And I felt bad that I said that to him. And that’s when I said, okay, I need to do something else because right now everything is closed. So I need to do something that’s going to bring me back down and work on myself being in a Mexican family. They don’t believe in therapy.

They’re just like, that’s for the week and blah, blah, blah. But I love to go and talk to someone and get feedback to improve myself. So, but it’s been years since I’ve gone to therapy. I, you know, uh, because during my job being in special ed at the very beginning. I was being up by a student, so I ended up getting PTSD.

So I did go to therapy and I loved it, but it’s been, it’s been a while since I’ve gone, so I was just like, I need someone to direct me on how to navigate this road and not be so crazy that it’s driving a wedge between me and my husband and it’s no longer being romantic, it’s becoming a job and a job that we both both starting to hate.

So that’s where I’m like, okay, I need to do something that doesn’t require physical work, but it all in the mind. Yeah. And I remember that about you. I mean, you, because it was really important to you to have this. I mean, cause we talk about this all the time to like healthy family, healthy pregnancy, healthy mom, like all of this goodness all around you.

And it was just, and I remember when you’re, when you’re in the group, it’s like, everybody loves you. Always kept it real girl. You always kept it real. It was so good. My mom in the trees, you know, she’s, she still has her moments. And I still, I still have that velvet rope that I’m like, ah, we’re closing you off for a bit.

Um, it wasn’t too long ago that she, She started up again and I said, you know what? I told my husband, I got to put her behind that velvet robe because you know, I’m pregnant. I don’t want to stress out. It’s not my issue. She’s got something that she’s upset about. And so we went for two weeks without really talking or her coming over.

And it was the best thing ever. And then she came back and apologized. I think that’s fantastic. Well, so let’s talk about like, what were some of the things that you noticed that changed for you? Because I, I distinctly remember Diana when she started and Diana, I mean, which we’ll get to later when I got the call.

And when I was in orange County, yeah, but like, Tell us a little bit about like, what did you notice changing in you when you made the decision that you weren’t going to let your mind, you know, fuck with your marriage and you know, your, your fertility, you really wanted things to be mellow and you really wanted a great environment to bring this baby into.

Yeah, I think I, obviously I made the choice to work on my mindset because it was already, you know, just separating my husband and I, and I was like, if I want a baby, I need my husband, like, I can’t be on him and, and blame him for everything. And I, at that point, that’s what I was. Doing exactly doing blaming him for everything.

I said, no, you know, like he’s never going to want to have a baby with me. If I’m acting this certain way. So when I first started, I didn’t know what to expect, but I did do your homework. Cause I think I joined like the, uh, later in the week before that Saturday call. And so that Friday I did the homework.

I remember, um, what was I doing? I, Oh, my, my mom had this doctor’s appointment, but I couldn’t go in there. So I decided, you know, I’m going to do it in the car, like. So I played your, uh, your tape and everything. And I had my folder and everything. I was ready. I did everything that you said to do. And when the first class, I was like, Oh my God, why do I feel so much lighter?

And it just felt really, I felt really good. I’m like, okay. Like. It was step one, but it had already made a difference. And I remember coming home after I dropped off my mom, I came home and I told my husband like, Oh, he goes, Oh, did you do your homework? And that was one thing that when I talked to him about doing your course, he’s like.

Are you going to do all the homework? And I said, yes. And he made sure that every week I was doing the homework. And then there was some homework said he would do it with me. Like he would hear it. And then we would both do it because he was just like, you know what? If you want me to, I’ll do it with you.

I’m like, yeah, okay. Women all over the world are going to fall in love with your husband right now, because they’re like, he does the homework to the homework. I remember that time where you said to go by. baby clothes, because I was definitely afraid of that. And I said, okay, the hallmark is to go and buy baby clothes.

And he goes, are you ready? And I was like, No, I know I have to go to that one section at Target. I always look after the miscarriage and he’s like, let’s go. And he goes, you can pick whatever you want. And I said, okay. So I had some outfits that I had even locked up. And he was like, do you want me to take the box down?

I’m like, let me go buy something first and see how I feel then. We could take that box down. He said, okay. So we went to Target. I remember he held my hand and he goes, this is cute. And then the first thing that, and it was funny because I didn’t really think about the miscarriage, but I was like, that’s a boy.

What if we have a girl? We need to get something that we know it’s for boy and girl. And he was like, okay, okay. So what, what do you think? And so I felt okay after that. And then I came home. He’s like, Should I take the box down? And I said, okay, let’s, let’s see, take the box down and I’ll see. And so he did baby steps.

And after that, I was like, okay, I’m okay. And he’s like, we’re going to be okay. But that’s just how much, like my husband was like fully supporting and he did the homework. So that’s why I, after then I forgot what week that was, but I was starting to notice a big change in me that I was like, okay, I’m not blaming him.

I’m not expecting him to give me that feeling. It’s me who’s doing it because the miscarriage really made me feel like I was broken, like something was wrong with me and I was expecting someone else to like, here’s the magic pill to make you feel better. And it just, it wasn’t I, well, I should, I guess I should say like I, I was expecting it to someone else to fix me, and I think that’s the pressure that I was putting on my husband.

Wow. That’s massive. To be able to figure that part out. Because some people will go on for their entire marriage, expecting their partner to fix them. Yeah. And like, look at you now. Yeah. And I remember my husband, he’s like, if you can’t fix yourself, like, then we’re gonna have problems. And I guess that also like, oh shit, like, am I doing that again?

Mm hmm. Because when I went through, through, through PTSD, it was the same thing that I was snapping at him and getting mad at him. And that’s when he realized, he’s like, you need to go and talk to someone because you got to fix yourself. I don’t know how to do that for you. And I can’t do that for you.

You have to do it for you. So that’s when I went to help with PTSD. And so when he mentioned that again, I was like, Oh my God, I am doing that again. So That’s when I said, okay, no, I need to do these courses. And so when I explained to him about your program and that’s when he said, are you going to do it?

Like, I don’t want you to say you’re going to do it and do it. Right. Say, well, yeah. And he goes, OK, he’s like, well, I’ll support you. He goes, if that’s what you want, do it. And I said, OK. And so he noticed the difference, too. And. You know, every Saturday morning he’d be sleeping, but after our sessions were done, he goes, so what did Roseanne say?

I love

it. And like in teacher mode, you were always there ready to go smile, kick ass questions. Like what was one of, I mean, that’s a huge breakthrough for you on a personal level and as well as. when it comes to your rel do you think was the bigg it came to this journey? towards the end, I just k That in me, I was, I stopped fussing about, I need to have a baby and it went back to, and I think I did say that towards the end of the, of the class that we went back to like when we were first dating those butterflies and you know, the romantic dinners, even though COVID was happening, he was still like, what do you want to eat today?

Like Friday was always our date night and he kept up with that. And then all of a sudden it was just like. I still continue to do the, to see if I was ovulating and stuff. And I remember that I did tell you, I’m like, I, I hit two peak days this week, which never happens. And I noticed a difference that something was different in me because I wasn’t, I wasn’t running to him and saying, Oh my God, we’re, you know, I hit it hit, like we need to have sex right now.

I just remember saying, if it happens, It’s going to happen. And so I just, I didn’t put any pressure on him or myself. I wasn’t over obsessing that we have 40 hours to have sex or three days after it hits, you know, we have to have sex. I said, no, it’s just. It has to happen. And so, and I remember that he also noticed and he, he’s like, you know, this is, I see a difference and I was like, yeah.

And then he was like, it’s kind of turning me on. And I was like, let’s go.

It’s going to love Mr. Sarkar, like, it’s just so good. He’s just so good. I mean, but think about like, I mean, that’s massive to not be an obsession mode. Yes. And I, I stop obsessing every week. I got less obsessive and I know everybody says it like, oh, when you’re not thinking about it, it’ll happen. And I don’t think that you’re not thinking about it.

I just don’t think you’re not obsessing. And it’s not taking over your life. Like I just said, like, if it’s meant to be, it’s going to happen. You know, I got pregnant once, I can do it again, but it just has to be when the time is right. And my, maybe it’s just not my time. And even when I was getting my periods before I would cry when it would come, It was just like, okay, Roseanne said don’t future trip.

We’ll just keep going. And so I stopped crying, but that was me. I was becoming obsessed over this and it was just taking over and it was becoming a monster. And when he stopped, when he noticed that I stopped, it just, we got that romance back into the equation. Wow. Because we Yeah, it was just not romantic.

It was more like a job. And it was just, even I noticed, I’m like, God, that was awful. And I was like, this is not working. Like, no. Right. It’s just, it was not working for us anymore. No. And so, okay, and so you do the program. And then I remember being down in Orange County doing a photo shoot and then I get this message.

Talk to us about that. Okay, so let me see. This was in June, right? I think it was June. So the fertility clinic said, Oh, we’re opening up again. Do you want to schedule your IUI? And I said, Oh yeah. I had not thought that I. Was pregnant. I mean, I knew we did the deed and everything, but like I said, I wasn’t obsessing over.

I just said, and my period is going to come, but it’s all right. We’re having fun. I mean, I, at that time I thought to myself, okay, maybe we just need the romance back in. So let’s work on that. So I wasn’t thinking baby. So when they call, they said, Oh, when was your first day of your last period? And so I looked at my calendar and I said, Oh, and she goes, what’s going on?

I said, I’m actually late. And she’s like, Oh, well, take a test and then call us back. And at that time, uh, we also had gotten a new puppy. I remember! I remember puffing that. Puppy, we were just like, um, okay, you know, maybe we’re not meant to be, you know, parents of humans right now, but we love animals. In our household, we love animals.

So our neighbor had German shepherds and you know, we went and we asked and they said, yeah, come pick one. We picked the smallest one. We fell in love. So my, mine was also moved out of baby mode and moved to this puppy. And so, you know, I remember, um, I, after I hung up with the fertility clinic, I, I told my husband, I said, and he goes, Oh, what’d they say?

Are we scheduled? And I said, no, why not? And I said, because I’m late. And he goes, yeah, Well, just go buy a test like nothing. Just go to Target. He’s like go to your favorite store and go buy a test and then buy yourself something at the dollar section because I love going to that dollar section. Yeah. Oh my god.

So I went and I didn’t think about it and we and I got in and I said okay and then I think it was the next day because he’s like you’re gonna take it today I’m like no no no I’m not gonna take it today like Watch it come in the evening. I don’t know. Nah. And he’s like, all right, well, whenever you want to take it, just let me know.

I said, okay. So then the following day I was getting antsy because he’s like, what’s going on? I said, well, she didn’t come. We always say she. Yeah. Or like she didn’t come. And he’s like, just take it. And we were getting ready to take all the pups on a walk. And, um, he’s like, just take it. Like, I’ll put the harness on them.

And, and by that time, we should know. And then I was dreading it. And he’s like, oh my God. And I remember he pushed me, like, just go already. He’s like, just do it. Like, get it over with. So we took the test. I go out, I walk out. And then he’s like, so now what? I go, we wait until it says yes or no. He’s like, okay.

few minutes pass by and he’s like, you’re going to go check on me. And I said, ah, I go, I already know it’s a negative. I’ll just go. And I, when I saw, you know, pregnant and I remember walking out and I started laughing, but also crying at the same time. He goes, what? I go, my God, we’re pregnant. And he’s like, Don’t tell anyone.

I’m like, what do you mean? Don’t tell anyone. I got temporal. Oh my gosh. And we were at my husband’s favorite restaurant and you know, it was just in San Clemente and I looked and I’m like, Ooh, I called you right away. Cause I’m like, Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. I mean, it, it just think about like how quickly you turned things around.

From like the Diana that came in April. Yeah. To here you are in July, you know, in the midst of a freaking pandemic. Tilted uterus addressed. Like you’re, you know, taking good care of yourself. You’re, you’re stopping the obsession, changing things in, you know, the, the way that you communicate in your marriage, taking the pressure off you.

And now

it’s crazy, the transformation and it’s crazy how fast it happened. Yeah. It was two weeks after our last Saturday class that. We got, you know, we found out that we were pregnant. I think that’s what I was laughing at. And he’s like, what’s so funny. And I was like, Oh my God. Like, I just need a rose. I’m like, after those quarters, like, and he goes, then we got pregnant.

I’m like, yeah. Oh my gosh. Well, months of tribe and traveling everywhere. Cause even our acupuncture was like in Westlake, which is like. Oh, we dreaded going. Oh my gosh, twice a week. We were going twice a week. And, um, and actually like I told him, I go, isn’t it so scary that while, cause it’s heading towards past Calabasas.

We had actually seen like that whole Kobe Bryant, like the smoke and everything, because it was off the freeway. And we didn’t know we were in session when we come out. It’s when we heard the news. And I think like, I was just like, Oh my God, like the, what that time, like all the shit that happened. It’s been one wild.

It has. Yeah. And so I think that’s why I was laughing and crying. I was crying because I was happy with laughing. I’m like, That’s all I needed was Roseanne for my life. Oh my god. I mean, but you were doing, you did the heavy lifting. Like, you were always there. You were clearly doing the work. You were showing up, you know, and you were just bringing such good energy.

To all of this. I mean, it doesn’t surprise me. It doesn’t surprise me at all. So like, what would you tell women who are listening to this, who, you know, are freaking out that they’re over 35, you know, and You know, trying all these things and, you know, starting to get scared. Like, what would you want them to know?

Like, this is, I love this part because it’s always about the wisdom that you would share with other women. I think just that whole freaking out and being obsessed over it is, it is totally what was, is blocking it. Your, in your road, in your block. Right. That’s your roadblock in your road, because that was mine.

And the minute I made that choice to just let it go, like I to admit that it is on my road. It is blocking me, but I can take it out because I, it’s hard, it was hard to like take it out of the equation because I’m like. Okay, if I don’t think about it, but what if it doesn’t happen? Right, you have to let it go.

And I think that was the most difficult part for me was to to just not obsess over it and just believe that it’s going to happen. When it’s meant to happen. And I, I remember everyone kept telling me that and I was like, you’re full of shit. Like it doesn’t work that way. If you’re right, it’s not going to happen, but it’s not that you’re not trying.

It’s just, you are taking things out that clearly are not working and you’re going to put something else in there. Right, because there was no point in time that you gave up on having a baby and when No, never. Yeah. I mean, you basically are, you learned how to surrender because it wasn’t, it wasn’t that you weren’t trying.

It wasn’t that you didn’t care. It wasn’t that you didn’t want this baby. Yeah. It was that you were no longer going to let the negativity drive you. Yeah. Yeah. Because I definitely have what you call the saboteurs. I have those. And I would do those, those, uh, 25, I think of 25 things that are in the room to bring you back to reality because, oh my God, future tripping was my favorite.

I mean, I hated it, but I would do it every day. And even though I would say, okay, I’m going to do something else. I remember I was, um, going through lesson planning and I, it took me an hour because I was future tripping while lesson planning. It was, it was just taking over my whole life. Yeah. And so, yeah, I mean it’s not that you’re, you’re giving up and, and you’re not trying, it’s just There’s these negatives that don’t work and that’s what you’re just replacing them with things that would give you hope, give you faith and that do work.

And I think at that point I had lost my faith, which is why I started replacing it with these negative thoughts and feelings. Wow. So that’s, I mean, it’s extraordinary how far you came so quickly and, and how you just, you, it, It’s interesting now because I can see it in you now. I can really see it. And, and, uh, and we have to tell the ladies cause like they’re, I’m sure they’re dying to know, like, so how far along are you today?

Uh, we just hit seven months on Wednesday.

Growing and kicking and oh my God, I love every moment of it. Even though it was Sick. I’ve been sick, but I don’t care. It’s worth it. I know. And like, just, just seeing you on this side of it, like, you know, you hear me say this all the time that it’s 10, 000 times better than you ever imagined. And like you, I mean, just how you’re glowing and how, you know, there’s, there’s real joy in you and you took over the most important asset that you have.

And that’s your brain. Yeah, you’re literally creating your experience. I mean, I think that’s so brilliant and I, and I love and feel so honored that you’re sharing your story with us because I think, you know, this audience is a group of women that are lovably type a control, freaky professionals from all over the world.

And we don’t like to hear just relax, you know, but, and that’s how I was. I think at the very beginning I was like, um, Oh, what was her name? Robin. Yeah. I’m like, why is she so calm? How is she so calm? And I remember the second week, I’m like, I want to be like Robin. Like, she was just so calm and peace. And even when she was going through her trials, I’m like, how is she so calm?

I know. Like, it would kind of drive me crazy. But that for me, I was like, I inspired to be like Robin. She was just. She brought, um, this calming energy to me that I’m like, I have to be like her like that at my, at the end of these eight weeks, I’m going to be like Robin, where she just, she knew how to let things go.

I remember she had issues with her mother in law and I was like, me too. Yeah. Okay. So just between us girls and like the entire globe. Robyn’s gonna be on here pretty soon, so there’s good news to be going all around. Another one of your classmates, girl. Oh my goodness. Oh my gosh. I love the course and I love that there was other women and it was non judgmental and I loved that I had these like, you know, role models.

Like, I was at the very beginning, but there were some that had already been. Through the program more late and further along than I was. And I was like, how are they like that? And as I went through the program, like, Oh, I’m becoming one of them. Cause I remember the newcomers would come in and I was like, Oh my God, it was me.

You’re like, you’re like the senior girl. You’re like, just hang out, girl. You’re tripping now, but just wait till week. Five and like, but I mean, it’s just incredible. I mean, and I, I really appreciate that observation, especially from you as a, you know, professional educator where you can see that transformation and you get to watch it.

And it’s exciting, not only in yourself, but in your sisters, as you watch these women. Just make these dramatic changes in their lives and position them themselves for a higher level of success. I mean, it’s just, it’s crazy. And you know, just seeing you today and like, I love it. You know, like I always tell my ladies and my people don’t believe me, but I’ve got pea sticks all over my phone.

Like pictures of pea sticks and I’m like, it’s the best thing ever. You know, it’s just such a good thing to see you so happy. You deserve this joy and you’re going to have to give Mr. Cerna a big, giant hug for me. And I can’t wait to see pictures of baby Yoda and like, and just all kinds of like so much, you know, love and blessings to your family, my darling.

And is there anything else that you would want to say to the women listening? Any bits of any parting words? You know, just because I’m pregnant doesn’t mean that I’m not, I’m still not doing the homework. I still do it to this day and I applied it to my professional life. And I do do the velvet robe with certain coworkers and I’m like, Oh no, they’re negative.

I’m like, they’re bitter. I’m going to pray for them, but I don’t need them in my circle right now. You send them away with love and a prayer. Yeah. And so, um, my circle of supportive women and in my group, they’re still the same ones. Um, and I think during that program, I even let go of some that were just so Nate, I remember writing to remember there’s a one old friend who like we hadn’t spoken in two years and she decided to send me this awful email.

And I was like, you know what I choose. Not to like follow up and I just wished her well and I just said I hope you find happiness the way I did and even that I think it made her upset but I didn’t mean to make her upset. I just, I send her off, um, wishing her well and, and, and hope because I know that she, you know, wants to get married and have children as well.

She’s older than I am and I just hope she finds it one day but I think the old me would have been like ready to attack, have my you My evidence of what she did to me and I just learned to just let things go. And even now during pregnancy, like when there, there are these little tits for tats, I tell the, the, the family, I’m like, it’s not worth it.

Just don’t like, no, I’m pregnant. I’m how I’m happy. I’m healthy. The babies. healthy, just no, I don’t need that. And so the homework we still do, and I say we, cause my husband does the same thing. I, you know, some days when he’s stressed out and, you know, he’s snapping at the, at the pup. So I’m like, Oh, will you be naked?

Well, and you know, I think it’s, it’s really brought that natural leader out in you. And I think, and I just makes me so happy to see you thriving because you know, your mom now, like you’re, this is. This is your path and, you know, taking that leadership role in your family and in your life. It’s just, it’s so brilliant to see Diana.

And so, thank you so much, my darling, for being with us. Loves! Wasn’t Diana amazing? Isn’t her story inspiring? Well, I really hope that it sets your heart ablaze for all of the possibilities that you have to make your dreams come true this year. And if you want to learn what she learned, my fearlessly fertile method program is for women who intend to get pregnant in the next 12 months and say, hell yes, to covering their bases, mind and body.

So you don’t have to look back on this time in your life with regret. I work with women just like Diana who are committed to success. To apply for your interview for this revolutionary program, go to my website, www.FromMaybeToBaby.com and apply for an interview there. My methodology is to help women around the world make their mom dreams come true.

Their results, like Diana’s, speak for themselves. If you don’t have a mindset for success on this journey, baby girl, you’ve got a gap in hole in your strategy. Let’s fix that shit and set you up for success. Till next time, change your mindset. Change your results. Love this episode of The Fearlessly Fertile Podcast.

Subscribe now and leave an awesome review. Remember, the desire in your heart to be a mom is there because it was meant for you. When it comes to your dreams, keep saying hell yes.

Rosanne offers a variety of programs to help you on your fertility journey — from Self-study, to Live, to Private Coaching.