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Wish you had a secret weapon to use against the hairy hands of fear? Learn how to neutralize your fear with something way more powerful than positive thinking, that will kick fear’s a** every time.
Transcript:
Hey Gorgeous, if you want success on your fertility journey, you’ve got to have the mindset for it. It’s time to kick fear, negativity, doubt, shame, jealousy, and the whole clown car of low vibe fertility journey BS to the curb. I’m your host, Roseanne Austin, Fertility Mindset Master. Former prosecutor and recovering type A control freak perfectionist, I use the power of mindset to get pregnant naturally and have my baby boy at 43, despite years of fertility treatment failure.
I hope women across the globe beat the odds on their fertility journey. Just like I did get ready for a quick hit of confidence, joy, feminine, badassery, and loads of hell. Yes. For your fertility journey. It’s time to get fearless, baby, fearlessly fertile. Let’s do this. Welcome to the fearlessly fertile podcast.
Episode 13 kick fears ass every time. With this, is it just me or does it seem like one of the predominant emotions we feel on this journey is fear? Low down, dirty fear. It’s amazing to notice the contrast between the daydreaming we did back in the days when we thought all this baby making shit might be a breeze.
Ah, the salad days. All of that eager anticipation was quickly replaced by knots in your stomach, jittery weirdness at the mention of babies, and a creeping undercurrent of anxiety and doom. That doesn’t even begin to capture all of the agonizing we do over the life choices we have made up to this point.
I’m talking we go back decades, right? Agonizing over missed opportunities and endless coulda, woulda, shouldas. Barf. Take a deep breath mama to be. While it may not seem like it, and you might want to kick me in the head for saying this, you are exactly in the right place. You didn’t miss out. You didn’t fuck up.
This journey is just part of your life story. Now, there may be part of you saying, Fuck you, Roseanne, and your woo woo bullshit. That’s easy for you to say. You have your baby. While that fact is true, I can assure you, getting to this point wasn’t exactly easy. And it was more do than woo. I earned this shit.
I learned a lot of hard lessons that tested my faith and just about everything I believe. And, at one point, I almost gave up. That is why I can teach you what I’m about to teach you with 100 percent certainty. This is shit I had to learn and implement on a daily fucking basis. And it paid off for me, like it has for my clients around the world.
So, let’s get down to brass tacks. How do you kick fear’s ass every time? Simple. Gratitude. Before you roll your eyes and turn this podcast off, hear a sister out. I am sharing this because I fucking love you and want to give you a chance to avoid the ridiculous mistakes I made If I Can’t. That’s the point of having a coach in your life, isn’t it?
Who the fuck wants to have to reinvent the wheel and have it take ten times as long as it has to? Why not have the awesomely unfair advantage of having insider information on this journey from someone who knows what the fuck she’s talking about because she beat the odds herself? This shit works. So stay with me, okay?
In the darkest moments on my journey, it would have been a gargantuan task to be grateful. In fact, I can honestly tell you it felt like Pollyanna bullshit. Back then, it seemed like being grateful was a cop out or even worse, settling. Yes, I was that mad at the universe and God. It felt like the whole situation was ridiculously unjust.
And all of that just kept me in a place of, why me? Total victim y bullshit. When I took control of what I thought and believed, and therefore started empowering myself on this journey, What I came to realize is through gratitude, I could see how indeed I was being guided. What I refer to as God was looking out for me, and the universe, as Gabby Bernstein so aptly puts it, did have my back, if I was willing to see it.
I was being supported by something bigger than me the whole time. It just wasn’t visible to me, even though it was standing right there in front of my brown eyes. I was so caught up in my own drama, I was blinded to the grace that was all around me. Don’t worry, I’m not here to proselytize any specific set of beliefs except that gratitude works.
If you want to slay fear, you better get your ass in deep gratitude. I also know that gratitude can get a bad rap because often it’s used to keep us small or make us wrong for our desires. How many times have you heard, Oh, you should be grateful for what you have. As a way of scolding your desire for more.
How many times have you heard that? Oh, just be grateful. Just be grateful for what you have. It’s like it’s, there’s some mass attempt out there to try to stop us from wanting more. The whole truth is, Gratitude is a way of seeing how much good is in our lives as evidence of what is possible. Gratitude is awesome because it’s like saying, Wow, I have all this cool shit in my life.
This is evidence of the good that is to come. Your view of gratitude, whether it keeps you small or encourages you to ask for more, is a reflection of your views on abundance and possibility of it in your life. It’s huge. I am encouraging you to use gratitude as a basis for asking for more in this life.
Gratitude is a way of really seeing the tangible evidence of all the good that is presently in your life and what is possible. The good that’s in your life is just the tip of the iceberg, baby. You didn’t exhaust all the good that you had coming to you when you were seven years old and won a spelling bee.
There is no limit to the good that is possible in this life. The truth is that even in the scariest situations, you can find something to be grateful for. You might not be able to articulate it in the moment, but if you are committed to a mindset that is way more fucking productive than endless wallowing, negativity, and despair, you will find it.
And when you do, it’ll be like a breath of fresh air. Gratitude has the power to neutralize fear. Really get that into your beautiful brain. Gratitude has the power to neutralize fear. You simply can’t be afraid at the same time you are in deep gratitude. You can’t. And here’s what you have to understand about fear on this journey.
Fear on this journey is largely driven by a feeling of lack in scarcity. Think about all the shit that’s coming at us at 90 miles an hour. Statistics, stories, and limiting beliefs about money, which are mostly other people’s stories about money, by the way. Running out of time because of age, agonizing about the number of times you’ve quote, failed.
Worrying about what your partner is going to think, and are they still going to be by your side if you want to keep going? Worrying about what family is going to think, you know, are they going to be there to support you if you continue to keep going on this journey? It’s all about what you’re going to lose.
It’s all about lack and scarcity. The things that scare us most in our mind are all related to lack and scarcity. When you think about it, it’s not even the physical shit that scares us the most on this journey. I’ve known grown, bad as fuck women who will stab themselves in the ass with a 2 inch, large gauge needle that is attached to a syringe full of progesterone in oil without flinching, like a fucking gladiator, who will be reduced to tears over a Pampers commercial overcome by the notion of what she doesn’t have.
When you face that lack and scarcity based fear head on with gratitude, you will kick it in the balls every fucking time. Every fucking time. When you get into deep gratitude, basically what you are saying is, Fear, you’re full of shit. Things do work out for me. Look at all the things in my life that have worked out.
I have a hell of a lot of things to be grateful for, so fuck you. I jump and the net appears. It may feel like I have to fall for a while before it shows up, but that net does show up. Just in the nick of time. If you catch yourself saying shit like, I am grateful, but Wrong. Time to dig deeper, babe. Check your gratitude, because it sounds a hell of a lot like scarcity if you catch yourself saying, I am grateful, but You don’t need to waste your time with that.
Focus on your gratitude. Gratitude is amazing because not only does it instantly neutralize your fear, it builds your faith. As one of my favorite mentors always says, fear and faith require us to believe in something we can’t see. Choose wisely. When you step to your fear with gratitude and faith, it’s like you’re punching it in the nuts and the throat at the same time!
Woohoo! Now that is a clutch move of one badass bitch. So your new battle cry is going to be this. I am so grateful for all that I have, and I want more. And don’t you dare let anyone tell you that is greedy. That is faith, and that is gratitude. Knowing that this is a kind and generous universe, and there is more than enough.
for even you, my darling. Oh, and real quick, did you notice the and in that statement? I am so grateful for all that I have, and I want more. And is about abundance, belief, and positive pregnancy making possibility. I’ve got way more on that subject, but that will be for another time. For right now, Focus on facing your fear with gratitude.
Watch your fear scurry away like a pipe cleaner armed crybaby wuss. Fear is no match for your gratitude, babe. So here’s an exercise. Answer your fear with gratitude. Whenever you feel fear, find one thing to be grateful for. Maybe it’s the fact that you’re even in that particular situation. Maybe it’s the fact that you had the money for another round if you happened to be doing fertility treatments.
Maybe someone was really cool with you in the waiting room. Maybe you have the strength to go another day. It doesn’t matter. Dig deep. If you can’t think of anything in the present to be grateful for, think back to a moment of grace and blessing when you were a kid. Now, next, if you really want a gold star here, make a list of 50 things you are grateful for.
I don’t care if you have to scrape for things to put on that list, just fucking do it. Then see how blessed you are, and that in truth, you don’t have a damn thing to be afraid of. Don’t let fear chase you out of the ring. Love. Let gratitude keep you fighting another day. If you need help with this, my team, put a super sexy me gratitude journal together to have your back on this particular exercise.
Email my team at info at from maybe to baby.com to get yours. If you don’t already have it, we’ll give it to you. Plus you’ll get weekly goodness from us. Okay, love, you now have a place to start when it comes to slaying your fear with gratitude. If you want to learn more about me, my coaching practice, my online courses that are changing the lives of women across the globe, or read my amazing client success stories, check me out at www.FromMaybeToBaby.com or see what I’m up to on Instagram at RoseanneAustinFertility. Till next time, change your mindset. Change your results. Love this episode of The Fearlessly Fertile Podcast. Subscribe now and leave an awesome review. Remember the desire in your heart to be a mom is there because it was meant for you.
When it comes to your dreams, keep saying hell yes.