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In this special XL episode, meet the amazing Dr. Lucy, who a couple months after getting married was told she had a less than 10% chance of getting pregnant and that she needed donor eggs, at 31. This brilliant physician had to look beyond her medical training to see that not only was it possible for her to get pregnant, she could do it HER way, on her terms. Lucy’s story is one that will inspire the hell out of you and empower you to see beyond your past results and dismal statistics.
Transcript:
Hey gorgeous, if you want success on your fertility journey, you’ve got to have the mindset for it. It’s time to kick fear, negativity, doubt, shame, jealousy, and the whole clown car of low vibe fertility journey BS to the curb. I’m your host, Roseanne Austin, Fertility Mindset Master. Former prosecutor and recovering type A control freak perfectionist.
I use the power of mindset to get pregnant naturally and have my baby boy at 43, despite years of fertility treatment failure. I help women across the globe beat the odds on their fertility journey, just like I did. Get ready for a quick hit of confidence, joy, feminine badassery, and loads of hell yes for your fertility journey.
It’s time to get fearless, baby. Fearlessly fertile. Let’s do this. Welcome to the Fearlessly Fertile podcast, episode 28. My darlings, this is a special extra large episode of the Fearlessly Fertile podcast. And I am so excited that this week I am bringing an interview to you that I have been so excited about doing.
This woman is just gonna blow you away. Not only is Lucy brilliant, She is a human being that is all about integrity. She’s all about going for it. She’s all about trusting herself and she’s such a powerful example of what is possible for Every single woman on this journey if you are willing to unlock that part of you that says hell yes Lucy is such an incredible inspiration to all women on this journey Because not only is she brilliant, full of life, has this amazing mass of enviable curls, she had all the reasons in the world to not believe in herself.
As a trained physician, she knew the numbers, she knew the statistics, but she trusted herself, she trusted that inner knowing, that she was meant to be a mom, and she went for it. She was very clear on how she wanted to do her journey, and she left no stone unturned. on the path to getting to her precious baby.
There is no question in my mind that you are going to fall in love with Lucy as much as I have. So listen carefully to the wisdom that she has to offer. There, you’re going to hear so much goodness in this, I just can’t even stand it. So here is my interview. With a true angel on earth, Lucy. Hey my loves, I am so excited to be introducing you to one of the most amazing women I really have ever met in my career.
I remember from the first moment I heard Lucy’s voice. I knew in my heart that this woman, she was going to find a way and that I would love to get my hands on her and coach the hell out of her to help her make her dreams come true. And the whole time that I have spent with her, I have just been blown away.
Lucy is a woman who really knows what it means to make a decision and, and she is such an inspiration to me. In my work, but I know that she’s also going to be an inspiration for you So I am so excited for you to meet. Dr. Lucy this morning. So Lucy Tell us a little bit about how you got on this journey and a little bit about yourself Hi, good morning, everybody.
Good morning. Rosanna such a Very nice introduction. I’m so honored. I’ve got teary eyes. I’m so excited to be with you all this morning. So my journey starts when, um, in 2017, three months, my husband and I got married on June 3rd, 2017. Three months prior to that. I stopped having periods. I’m just out of the blue.
No rhyme. No reason. I knew something was off. But when I went to my physician to get it checked out, they said, Oh, it’s the stress of the wedding. But mind you, I had wedding planners. I was not stressed. At all. If anything, I was working, maybe working a little bit too much, just trying to, you know, prepare.
But other than that, I didn’t feel stressed. But everyone said to wait and I said, okay, but I started having the symptoms of just like low estrogen with hot flashes, phony. I just was very grumpy. And I knew again, something was off, but everyone said to wait. So I did. We got married. It was beautiful. And then after the wedding, same thing, no period.
I ended up not having a period for a total of about six to seven months. And prior to that, I was having them consistently every month. So I knew, again, something was wrong and I went to get my levels checked and they were off the charts. My alpha phase was over, um, a hundred. My antimalarian hormone was undetectable.
My estrogen was undetectable. Very low, and all my numbers added up to I was in menopause at the end of the day. And to hear that at 31 years of age was a big, uh, a big shock. Because how do you go from having consistent, regular periods every month to not having any, and be told that you’re in menopause, which is what women over the age of 55, 60 go into, was really disheartening.
But we were told That our chances of having a natural child would be less than 10 percent because even if I would have my periods back, I’d be considered pre menopause if it’s less than a year. And then during that, once, uh, once the egg was released, it was all going to be, it would be no rhyme, no reason.
I wouldn’t know when that would happen. And so all the stars would have to align. For us to get pregnant naturally, and that’s why they gave us that low, uh, statistic and percentage of us getting pregnant naturally. And it approached us a month after getting married of starting the donor egg process, which was not a way to start a newlywed life.
By any means. I will say this part of our marriage was very disgraceful, very disheartening, and just a whole lot of unknown and a whole lot of like, why did this happen to me when, you know, I was taking care of, you know, I was taking care of my body from what I thought. I was doing all the right things, you know, and it just, it didn’t really, it didn’t really make sense.
Um, and the more I searched, I just kept running into these roadblocks. It seemed like, you know, like we can’t figure out why, you know, this happens, but it does, it happens sometimes. And so that to me wasn’t a sufficient of an answer. And so there, my journey began in the summer of 2017. Wow, wow. Well, and so, you know, this is because hearing after you get married and you’re so young, to be told that basically you’re in menopause, I mean, that, that, and, and also knowing your training.
Because you’re a physician yourself. I am, yeah. Those numbers, I knew what they meant. Even though my specialty is emergency medicine, I never deal with those numbers. But I do remember learning about them in medical school and on my rotations. And then when I read up on it, it all made sense. And my symptoms, unfortunately, fit with those numbers.
We’re reflecting and what the positions were telling or telling me and so when I’d hear them when they would when I was sitting in the reproductive endocrine reproductive endocrinologist office and she was reeling already what I knew it almost felt like it was solidifying what those statistics meant and it made them more real and then made me more just disheartened and lose faith that You know, could I even get pregnant naturally and how did I make this 180 turn of being a healthy young 30 year old having periods every month and not even thinking twice to all of a sudden being told that you’re in perimenopause if not just Menopause, uh, was a big, a big blow.
It was a lot. Right. Right. So, tell us a little bit about, I mean, because you said that, you know, one of the conversations very early on was donor eggs, so, you know, tell us how that, you know, where that fit into the picture for you, if at all. Yeah, for us, you know, For me, personally, it did not just with our Catholic faith, but also with, again, my heart of hearts.
And that’s when I started working with you in September, October of that year, was I just knew that it was going to happen naturally. I was, you know, I did not want to hear, you know, and I’m like, you know, donor eggs are wonderful. And, you know, if it’s, you know, I’m not judging anyone who does it, you know, if it’s certain folks in their, um, on their journey.
But for me personally, it just did not fit. Uh, where I was in my journey, so I didn’t, I didn’t want to give up on my body yet. And to me, that’s what that deliberate conversation I was hearing meant, is that My body was quote old, my eggs were non existent and, you know, I could not have my own biological child at 31, which to me just didn’t fit my fertility goals or journey or how I envisioned my, my life.
And so I just put that on the back burner and said, this is just not for me. Maybe it would be at some point in time, but for me right now, I’m not going to give up on my body and my ovaries. And my ability to become a mom naturally. Yes, yes. And so that was your vision. That was your vision to become a mom naturally.
So tell us a little bit about, like, you know, having heard all of those harrowing statistics, seeing the numbers. That sounds like you had to do pretty much a 180 from your medical training. Oh yes, it was because I, you know, I appreciate medicine, um, I know medicine does wonderful things, but I also know that when it came to fertility, that there wasn’t enough scientific basis around the research to understand all of these intricacies of We know AMH 9 being undetectable and the FSH in this and how come all of a sudden one can go from completely normal regular periods to not having any for a period of 6 to 7 months other than being told.
For whatever reason, you’re in perimenopause, if not menopause. And so to me, that wasn’t enough. And that’s when I started doing my own research. You know, we went to, we went on a honeymoon, um, in August of that, so two months afterwards. And I just kind of put that all on the back burner. And I said, when I come back, I’m gonna come in with a clear head and approach this attack.
Like, I’ve done everything in my life and figure out, like, why this Maybe why this happened, but it’s not like this to reverse it. And I knew I could I believed I could and that’s when I started looking at other avenues like acupuncture mind abdominal massage I started Looking at my diet, and then also working with the wonderful Roseanne.
And I went in with like a full vengeance. I was like, you know what, I’m going to put it all on a table. I have nothing to lose, but everything to gain. So I kind of went in it completely headstrong and just tackled it from everything. Avenue that I could, I researched, you know, like Molly Sims has a blog about a fertility smoothie with like wheatgrass, all this.
I drink that thing every day. I need it every day. Because I knew I was like, you know, if I give it my all, I just knew in my heart of hearts that this was going to work. I didn’t know when it was going to work, but I knew it would at some point work. It had to, and so, yeah, so I started my journey then around September of 2017.
And then shortly thereafter, um, late September, early October, mid October. I actually got my period, I got a period after not having one for six to seven months. It was a small, it was a small win, but it was a win. Granted, I didn’t have one, it was inconsistent, but that didn’t matter. I was like, you know, the fact is, against all those statistics, I still had eggs.
So I knew my ovaries worked, I knew my body wasn’t giving up. So that gave me enough encouragement and enough faith to say, okay, like, this is a sign that I’m not meant to give up and jump directly to donor eight. Let’s give it some time and see how these other these other. Like changes I’m making affect my reproductive cycle and my ability to just to conceive naturally Wow, you know and so tell us a little bit about the thought process because you know, obviously I mean anyone listening to this is going to hear that you are a determined woman But there’s also a reality of how you live this daily.
Like, you know, what were some of the things that you had to be thinking to keep putting one foot in front of the other? Because, yes, you got your period, you know, you got your period back, but as you said, it was kind of inconsistent. So what were some of the things that you had to keep thinking, even in the face of that?
So I think, you know, for me it was, it was rough. And I remember, and I was actually looking through my journal, um, this morning before our chat with our beginning conversations, um, in 2017. But I remember, you know, ’cause during this whole time, even though I, I got my periods back and they were inconsistent, I still had all the signs and symptoms of low estrogen.
I was these hot, like I can just remember hop, I have it all over the beginning of my journalism and big letters and all caps. But it was just these hot flashes and they were so miserable, they’d keep me up at night. And then those would almost be like this huge setback because then I’d be, you know, the next day I’d just be, just feel so disheartened.
I’d feel like it was a little bit of a loss. I was going backwards. Um, even if a period would come, it would be, you know, very short. And then I started thinking back to those darn numbers I was told back. In June and July of 2017 about my hormone levels and how this, and I was almost living that truth that those numbers were my, were my truth when, in all honesty, they weren’t, they were just some facts, but how everyone interprets those are how.
You know, they can also vary from month to month, you know, I, I just took them to be like that. Those are the Bible, but they weren’t. And I think that to me was the biggest obstacle for me to overcome during our discussions and our chats is to not live by those numbers, but to live by what I knew in my heart was true.
Now was that I was going to be a mom come hell or high water. I was going to do it. And as you know, we progressed on our. In our chats, it was just finding that face and, you know, not giving up on my body and then changing how I viewed, you know, just little milestones and just, and that gave me the, the, the courage to keep going, but to also visualize, and that was the key too, is to visualize me being a mom, me having a pregnant belly, me, you know, talking to the baby, um, and visualizing where the baby would be in our home.
Um, and so all those things made me feel that this is more real than any of those statistics I was given. It was a fact that that baby is out there and is waiting. I just have to be in the right mind, have my heart open, be more my feminine and be willing to accept the baby. And yeah, I’m happy to say we’re almost 38 weeks pregnant now, so Woohoo!
Yeah, this little one is almost here. Almost, he’s still baking. Yeah, yeah. And so, you said a lot of really powerful things there. And, and so let’s give these ladies some examples, because You, because you really went full throttle, like, I mean, that, that’s why you’re, you’re clearly one of my superstars because you just, you just went for it.
I mean, I remember when we were chatting and you know, you, you and your husband, you bought a home and you know, you really went full throttle on your home. Didn’t you even create this baby’s room? Like you, you started setting it up. Oh yeah. So we got, you know, we purchased, so mine was just us. We already knew the darn statistics and you know, I know we bought a five bedroom house for just us two, you know, but I pulled them and he’s like, isn’t this too much?
I said, no, I was like, we’re going to fill it up.
And so, you know, and as the time progressed, like, you know, He became more, because he’s, he’s law based, he’s, he’s wonderful, of course, but these numbers, they, they are, they can completely take over your life, um, and they can take over any, any faith, any hope, if you let them, and so for him, it was like, you know, is this too much?
We’re getting this big house when it’s just us, we don’t know what’s going to happen, and I said, no, like, this is meant to be, and there’s already a room, um, off of our, like, on to our master bedroom, you know? And I said, this is gonna be the baby’s room. So, like, I already had it all designed how it was gonna look.
Like, it all made, it just was clear as day. Like, I didn’t have to have any more, uh, evidence or any, it just to me was so real. That this is where the baby was going to be, and it just made sense. It made, it just completely made sense. And I’m still doing it to this day, because we were buying strollers. I was making sure that we could do a double stroller, because we’re going to have more kids.
Like, well, we just have one. I was like, well, one right now, but I was like, we have to be able to expand it. Cause I was like, next summer, we’re gonna start a number two. Oh, man. I love that. I love that. I mean, do you realize how much courage that takes? That takes like ovaries of steel from a woman who was, you know, led to doubt her ovaries.
Like, that takes ovaries of steel to decorate the baby’s room, get the stroller, buy the five bedroom house. Like, I mean, that is huge. So something had to change about you. What do you think that was? I think it was just, you know, all our discussions about, I think I let those negative thoughts and those numbers become, you know, like I was saying my truth and also that the, the Sabbaths were, um, I love that word, but it was, it was, I was telling myself all these stories.
And these stories became my reality that I was living my life according to these stories, according to these facts or what others told, you know, told me. And again, I respect the medical specialty, but I knew that there was more, that there was something else that I could be doing that maybe didn’t fall into the realm of Western medicine that could assist in my, in my journey.
So it took, you know, letting go of what even I learned in medical school. The Eastern side of acupuncture and Chinese herbs and, you know, abdominal, you know, work and all those things like that’s never talked to us. So it did take, you know, some credits to let, you know, the Western part, you know, again, I know it’s there, but also explore other other options and give it a shot.
So, again, I had nothing to lose, but everything to gain settle at my guard down and allow these other individuals into my quote, bump squad. And know that they had as much faith in me as I had in me, or sometimes even more, because they would just look at me and be like, you’re not in menopause, you look great, like you’re not, no, that doesn’t make sense.
I’m like, I like you, you’re in. Yeah, yeah, well, and, and you certainly, you know, didn’t have the training to really think about yourself as this powerhouse, right? Like I mean, No. You had to really change what you thought about you. Mm hmm. Yeah, I have just more faith in myself and also love myself and I think because it got to the point where I was almost punishing myself and I was like, you know, in a way, making a pity party for myself.
Like, why did this happen to me? Why am I going through this? You know, I just, you know, I’ve worked so hard in my life, I try to do things the right way, and now I’m going through, quote, menopause, and don’t have that opportunity, like my friends or family, to have a family of my own naturally, and so there’s a whole lot of this just, you know, I was just tearing myself apart, and, you know, it didn’t suck, you know, at the beginning of this diagnosis, just put me in the spiral, in the way of depression, I was just so, you know.
And I just felt so down about myself, about my body. I was mad at my ovaries for quote, failing me. And why did they fail? And it was, you know, very, it was a huge, huge low until I came back. You know, I think from the honeymoon, like being away in Europe and just letting go and then coming back with a completely different mindset of.
Okay, like, this pity party is not going to get me anywhere. You know, being upset at my overuse or at my body is not going to get me anywhere. I need to change how I view these numbers, how I view these symptoms, and I need to do something different to get to my goal. Because I knew where I was heading.
With my mindset and all these thoughts, I wasn’t going to get to where I wanted to be. There was no way. I was just going in this downward downward spiral and I was just so angry and I knew that that wasn’t going to get me anywhere closer to my baby. Um, and that’s when I started researching potential individuals that could help in reference to, you know, herbalists and acupuncture and minor down the release and you.
And I knew I needed help. I knew I needed to get as many people on board to change, um, my, my outcome and to change, you know, how I viewed, uh, myself and also to get me more in this positive mindset and to let go of so much that I was holding onto that was holding me back. And so, yeah, I took a big, just a lot of letting my guard down, being vulnerable.
Um, and just allowing others to help when I had to have faith in them that they believed in me. And then also faith that, that what they recommended would benefit me in some way and get me close one step closer to a baby. Um, and so each period, like some people are like, Oh man, I got my period. I’d be like, hell yeah, I got my period.
And even when we were, you know, a little bit of more consistency, but, you know, my husband would be discouraged when we get a period, you know, a period after we were trying. I was like, no, but I was like, but it means that I still work. I was like, I don’t care that I got a period. I work. That’s what I’m talking about right now, is to, you know, have, you know, validation that, okay, these things that I’m doing, these sacrifices I’m making with diet, you know, what I’m doing with exercise.
With these herbs and smoothies and all these things are making an impact and my body was responding And so just these little milestones and you know, these little mini celebrations I’d have and I knew one day like, you know, I have a positive pregnancy test. So if I could just It wasn’t meant for them, but I, you know, my faith became stronger in God and I knew that he had a plan that was bigger than anything I could imagine.
Um, and so then when we found out this little guy was a Christmas baby, um, that’s a little Christmas present, but I, you know, looking at it, cause my husband is in, you know, wrapping up law school this semester, you know, I was, you know, in, Um, some leadership roles at work that I ended up actually letting go off so I can focus on my body and my journey.
Um, and I think all those things needed to happen and him, you know, being against towards the end of his schooling, you know, now we have all this time and energy to dedicate to this little guy where beforehand with his crazy school schedule and my work schedule, there was no way that we would, we’d give him the time that he.
Uh, that he deserves and so when it all lined up and I look back, I’m like, it had to be this way. Like it makes total sense now. And so just letting go and just trusting and having faith. It was also a big, um, a big part of this journey for sure, because reading those, you know, Bible verses where, you know, no one’s barren, you can have these kids, you can, there’s bearing the fruit.
All those things just started resonating with me, um, and I was like, you know, if God isn’t giving up all these people in a bunch of squad. Are giving up. I am not going to give up. Yes. Yes. Um, you know, keep fighting and, you know, and hopefully, you know, when the time is right, I knew that it was going to happen.
There was no ifs, ands, or buts. I knew and I take anyone up on it. I was like, I’m not a person that’s confrontational or argues, but I will take you to them. And I know that this would, this would happen. And that’s how we stopped even getting, you know, You know, my, they always ask, like, period back, we can check your FSH again, your anti malarian hormone.
I said, no, because those numbers don’t mean anything. And that’s something if you asked me a year before, I’d be like clinging to those numbers, but afterwards, like, I got them done, you know, the. First and second time in the summer of 2017 after my diagnosis, but since then, I’ve never had them checked again.
So it’s like, it doesn’t matter. I don’t care if it’s one, I don’t care if it’s 110. To me, it’s like, I know how I feel. And I started feeling better. I started not having the hot flashes. I started having more energy. I started being less grumpy. And so I knew without any of those numbers being retested, That I was that was doing better on my body was responding and that’s all I needed to have.
I didn’t need to have this, you know, statistic or this number tangible number. I just needed to have faith in my body and how I felt and I ran with it. I never tested it. Again. Yeah, no, that’s huge, because, I mean, especially with your background as a physician, you know, it would be really easy, as you said, to cling to those numbers and to be so focused and let those numbers dictate to you your level of belief and what you believe was possible for you.
And I love that. And they did. And they did for so long. Those numbers dictated my life for They took over and I just kept looking at them and researching them and, you know, the, and almost it was self deprecating of behavior, because I would just find more and more studies to support what those numbers meant.
And it just led to me not being able to be a mom naturally. And I just, and I was like, why am I doing this? I’m being like a masochist. Well, it’s self sabotage. It’s self sabotage at its finest. And that’s one of the things that, you know, It’s so critical. I mean, this is why what you think and what you believe is so foundational, because it requires you to completely upend the apple cart in some ways.
In with the way that you think because we’re naturally drawn to the number what it means and then we let that dictate our level of happiness and we let that dictate, you know what we think our chances are exactly. It’s like that objective data. It’s almost like as a society. We’re just clinging to numbers.
In any way, shape, or form. And it’s, you know, in some aspects, yes, those numbers, that data, like, knowing how much money you have in a bank account, always good to know before you start bouncing checks, etc. That’s fine. So, she said fertility, it’s, you know, I started, as I started exploring it more, researching it more.
There’s still a lot of it about it that we don’t even know, like vitamin D. I’m a big proponent, whoever’s listening is to get your vitamin D levels checked because 90 percent of us are going to be low. Um, and for fertility, they want you over 50. And I didn’t know that. No one along my journey ever asked about my vitamin D level.
They never inquired about it. I had it checked a couple of times. It was just part of a routine physical. Um, and I was in the low end of normal. But for fertility, I was way below normal. I was in the lower end of the 20s, mid 20s, and I needed to be closer into the 50s. And it was, and also the thyroid, um, which we’ve talked about is in the Western world, my TSH was normal.
It was 3. 3. Anything less than 4. 5 was considered normal. But for fertility, you want it between one and two. So I started Synthroid and I started megadoses. A vitamin D and by my by mega, I was like on a hundred thousand units a week. Yeah, so once that all leveled out within three months of starting those medications and I think of course I was already on the mindset boat and I already had my bum squat.
My diet was already to a tee. Then once that all happened, I think that was the last missing pieces of my puzzle after the retreat is when. I started this, um, inhaled sport that we all went to. Once I came back and started the Synthroid and the Mega Doses of Vitamin D, within two months we were pregnant.
Wow, wow, and oh my gosh, just so the ladies know, because I have had the good fortune of hugging and dancing with you in person. Oh yes. You gotta know that Lucy is just this powerhouse. She has this mass of beautiful curls. She’s wild. She’s amazing. She’s gorgeous. Like. I mean, there’s something that just changed for you.
Like, I mean, it’s like, I could see it. Like, when, when we were at the retreat, it was just so obvious to me. Like, it wasn’t a surprise. Well, I mean, it was a delightful, you know, surprise, you know, but not really a surprise when, when you got pregnant. I mean, that was just months after. I mean, it’s just crazy.
It was two months after, yeah, it was two months after the retreat, which is Unbelievable. I think the retreat needed to happen for me because it was being in the company of all those amazing women and yourself and, you know, we all had like our own journey in some way, shape or form for Tilly. It was all for different reasons or, you know, different obstacles or different situations, but we were all in it together.
And I think it was that, you know, just those exercises that we did addressing the sabbats were having We’ll You know, faith in our bodies and just all that energy I think was that final oomph I needed personally to just say, okay, cause I was hesitant to start more medicine, ironically, even though I’m in the medical field, but I was like, you know, I was like, I was clinging to that Western of my TSH is quote normal.
My vitamin D isn’t that low. And I was like, do I really need all this? And I was like, you know, when I came back and I was like, fuck it, I’m going to do it. And then I did it. It gave me the energy. So again, I was like, I have nothing to lose. I was like, why, like, who cares that I have to take a pill? And yeah, and it, and it worked.
And so it’s just, you know, just not giving up and having, you know, making sure that all these aspects are alive. Because a lot of times, No one’s going to tell you that your thyroid, according to Western medicine, is low. You have to be the proponent. Be like, you know what? I need, I need Synthroid. For me, luckily, an endocrinologist, as soon as she heard my story, saw my numbers, as soon as I walked into her office, that you need Synthroid.
Um, and I was like, okay, and then she’s like, you need a lot of vitamin D, but I know not everyone that maybe has access or has, you know, potentially someone on their bump squad that, you know, is, you know, a proponent of vitamin D and are getting it up to that level, but it’s, again, it’s not going to hurt.
And there are studies that say that vitamin D does affect fertility. And so it’s like, why not? You know, again, nothing loose. You’re doing all these other sacrifices with diet and exercise and, um, herbs, et cetera, and acupuncture, why not add in a little extra vitamin D love? Yeah, yeah, well, I mean, but that’s, I mean, that just goes for the proposition.
I mean, that, that look, you, you cover your bases. You be the woman that gets in the ring. You be the woman that is willing to pay the price. And exactly. Yeah. And you are such a shining example of that because you, you left no stone unturned, you know, and there was something else that you said that I want to make sure that we hit on because you talked a little bit about your femininity.
And how you were kind of working on that and you’re like, you know, and that’s, that’s a little hard for us, you know, who are professionals, you know, we’re used to go, go, go, and you in emergency medicine, you know, you’ve got to bring out your masculine and be like, you know, address, address, address when somebody comes in with some kind of, you know, urgent need and You know, so say a little bit about, like, what are some of the things or what is the way that you explore bringing out the femininity?
I mean, because, you know, you’re trying to have a baby, right? Like, so trying to do that doesn’t make a whole lot of sense. No, and I think that was, uh, you know, another one of the struggles I had when we were working through my multitude of, of issues with my survival that I was very, and I never realized that how masculine I was because in a way I had to be, you know, like You know, grew up with immigrant parents who didn’t speak the language.
I had to be, you know, the one that figures, navigates, like, okay, like, how do you write a check at a very young age? So a lot of responsibility was on me. I didn’t have time to sit there and, you know, address my emotions or all that. I just had to, you know, is survival mode. And so the same thing with medical school, it’s about surviving.
And so you are more in your masculine. Same thing with my field. It is very, you know, you have to be in the masculine. You have to have at all times, you know, it’s life or death. You have to be able to, you know, stand back, be poised and sit there and, you know, deal with this life threatening situation. And so, and you know, for me as well, I was like, you know, I was trying to, as soon as I finished residency, starting this new career, I wanted to keep climbing.
I was like, you know, what more administrative roles can I take on? It was more about climbing and climbing and taking on more and more responsibility. But then I realized as we started talking, I’m like, this is taking up so much of my time. And, you know, it was making me more, I was more in my masculine. I wanted to have control.
I wanted to have, you know, this, the title and the leadership and et cetera. And it wasn’t going to get me anywhere closer to my fertility journey. And so I did take a step back. I let go of those leadership roles. I just focused more on the clinical and academic aspect. Um, and I started pampering myself more, which I wasn’t doing.
Beforehand, I started doing more massages and, you know, again, incorporating the acupuncture and I started focusing more on myself and my body. And I think that put me more in the feminine and I felt with each of those, uh, with each of those things I added to my lifestyle and my routine, I felt more and more connected to the baby.
Because it allowed me to relax to turn my mind off and to sit there and focus like during those acupuncture sessions or the Maya Abdominal release sessions. I would sit there and just visualize the baby I spend that hour hour and 30 minutes and it would just be about me my ovaries and that baby And so it really, you know, it was a huge step forward And because I gave up, you know, I made more time for that baby in my life by giving up those responsibilities, you know, it allowed me to become closer and just visualize that baby and make that baby more real.
I talked, you know, I already had the, you know, name picked out. We already had, like, I knew it was going to be a boy and all that stuff came to fruition. It just, to me, was so clear each time. I could look forward to those sessions where it was the pamper time because I knew that was time for me and baby.
Um, and so the more sessions I did, I got more excited because I was like, you know what? That’s more time with the baby. Yes. And so, you know, I would tell the baby just like we talked about, I was like, you know, we have room for you. Like, this is the stuff that like I’ve done to make, you know, to make room for you, you know, in our lives is like, this is going to be your, like, I talked to the baby, like the baby was there, which is what, you know, you told me, I was like, you know, this is going to be your room.
I’m doing this with my work schedule or making more time, just, you know, feel free to come on. Oh, I love that. Whenever you want. And it’s just, and I, and again, it was just visual and I just always had this picture of this little baby boy in my mind and we’re definitely blessed to be, you know, he’s hopefully going to join us too, but it was just like the power.
I never realized the power of the mind and the visualization, but of mindset before, you know, again. Medicine, Western, like the medical school and all that, medically trained, like, initially, I’d be like, oh, there’s a whole bunch of fooey, like, this is all just, you know, how can the mind have so much control?
But as we progressed on our chats and this journey, and especially with the retreat, I was like, it is, like, mindset is a huge, huge part, because it’s easy to get discouraged. It is, it’s easy to get discouraged. To feel that, you know, you’re losing this battle to give up, to have the saboteurs or these negative stories take over because, you know, maybe a test doesn’t go how you expected or a treatment doesn’t go how you expected, but it takes that much more, um, courage to say, you know what, it just wasn’t my time and that’s okay.
Because I went through that. How many negative pregnancy tests I peed on, like, God only knows. Like, they have a huge Amazon, Amazon box. And there were times where I had to pee on 10 of them. I’m like, the first one was like, maybe this was just a joke. And I sit there and keep peeing, like, over and over and over and keep testing.
And then go buy a different brand because maybe this brand was like, you know, and I was just like, We’ve all done that. I was so sure that we were, you know, we were pregnant and then, you know, I get bummed, but I’m like, you know what? Okay. It wasn’t our time. You know, the period’s going to come. And we’ll just start over and you know, and that’s because that was Thanksgiving actually around Thanksgiving of last year when I was so sure and I talked to you about it.
I was like, we have my diet. Some point. I’m doing all this. I was 42 days late. And I was like, and I felt like I was pregnant, like my breasts were sore. I was like, this is for sure. And then when I, like, had the negative test, I was like, what the hell? How is this negative? And that’s when I peed on all these sticks.
But then the following month, so after that, I didn’t period at 15 days. So way too early. And then after that, we can see like, it makes no rhyme. It has no sense at all, but it was just the way it was supposed to be. Um, and I actually waited to take that test. So I was like, well, I was like, you know, I was going to wait until least 42 days and yeah.
And so when I had the positive test that I did go by out. By more brands and then peed on more sticks, um, and then actually went to work and ultrasounded myself. And then I saw the little baby in there with the little heartbeat. So at that point I was six, um, almost seven weeks and didn’t realize it because again, my cycles are all over the place.
You know, and it was just like this, I was like, oh, so surreal. I felt like I was out of body experience. But that was just, you know, just not giving up and not letting that negative test because if that was a year ago prior to that in 2017, and I had that happen, I just would be beyond like discouraged.
I’d be just crying and completely like my whole life would have just been in shambles. But now I was like, you know, okay, like it’s negative. That’s okay. Like the period is going to come. That was my goal is just to get another period. And then we try again. And so, yeah, it was a huge 180, but you know, the power of mindset definitely played out and having the right people in my life.
And it’s, you know, for all the ladies listening, it is okay. Cause I had to let go of some people that, you know, maybe didn’t have as much faith in my body or in my. You know, situation as I did. And so, you know, as nice as they were, I’m like, you know what, this really, this relationship isn’t working out to my benefit right now.
And my goal right now is baby. So, you know, like, as respected as you are in your field or what have you, it just wasn’t working for me. Um, and so I definitely had to be. Picky about who I let in and be sure that those folks were on my side and believed in me, um, as well and in my body and my ability to conceive a baby naturally.
Um, and I think that was the key, um, as well. It’s okay to let folks go, no matter how much accreditation or how many letters they have behind their name. That’s okay. Or what title they hold. It’s, you know, finding the person that fits you where you are in your journey right now. That’s what matters. Um, and being an advocate for yourself and you know, we, I always tell patients to be an advocate, you know, in the ER.
I’m like, you know what, if you’re not getting answers, like you have to keep going. But I take my own advice. I’m like, how can I tell them to be advocates for their own health? If I’m not doing it for my own self, and so that was a humbling moment, as well as like, you know what, I have to be able to advocate for my body and what I know to be true, um, and find people that are on that same team, and then we’ll go out there and just guns a blazin Yes, yes, I love it, I love it, and he’s coming in less than two weeks, approximately.
Yes, yeah, he’s, yeah, he’s, um. Yeah, he’s, he’s close. He’s dropping, so we’re getting close. Yeah, it’s, it’s amazing to me that like, you visualize this baby boy, and you end up, you know, having a baby boy. It’s just incredible. I mean, when I think about your story, you know, going from, you know, undetectable FSH, you know, you think you said your FSH was 100 and undetectable AMA.
Over 100, yeah. And like, all of this to, you know, 37 weeks and 6 days. You know, it, it’s, it’s incredible how powerful and how quickly things can change when you make the decision that you’re going for it. Because you were told that all of the stars had to align, and by being the woman who puts herself in the ring, says her hell yes, all of the stars did align.
I mean, it’s, it’s just your story is going to help so many women, my darling. So what I want, and I hope so. Yes. Yes. Well, so tell us, I mean, like if you were going to say one thing to these women who are listening, you know, now that you’re in the position that you’re in that, you know, you and your husband are getting ready to welcome this beautiful baby boy.
All of your hard work has paid off, all of the discipline, all of the things that you had to continue to believe and reinforce within yourself. What is one piece of advice that you would give any woman listening who is doubting herself or thinks that, you know, this isn’t possible for her? What would you tell her?
I tell her to just listen to her truth. It’s in her heart and no one can take that away. No statistic. No physician. No, you know, no one. It’s you. If you believe in your heart that you’re meant to be a mom, however, that is whether it’s IVF or donor egg or naturally don’t let that go. And don’t let anyone take that away from you.
Um, and just, you know, have the courage to continue on, on the journey, you know, if you need to make some changes, whether it’s diet or taking that vitamin D, um, you know, get your thyroid, but do whatever you have to do, but never give up and just keep listening to whatever is in front of you. Your heart, that could change with time, but whatever is in your heart of hearts, hold on to that and your heart will lead you to the people that are meant to be in your life to get you to that goal.
Um, and even if you have some, you know, some roadblocks or, you know, that happened along the way, it’s how you view it. I’ve learned along this journey is a big deal. It’s not that it’s a failure. It’s just meant we’re not right now. And so it gives you the opportunity to maybe make some other changes to get you closer to that baby that you want or that you visualize, um, and the power visualization as well.
It’s, you know, talk to that baby. Um, you know, that baby should be as real as you were. You and I are. And, you know, with all those, I think all those measures in place, you’ll get to that goal at some point, and you’ll get to be able to hold that baby. Mmm! Oh my goodness, Lucy, thank you so much for being with us.
This is just incredible. Thank you for having me! Yeah! Oh gosh, and thank you for making the time, you know, considering your baby boy’s gonna be here so soon. Thank you so much, my darling. It has been a pleasure. Thank you, Rosanne. Thank you for everything and for getting me to this, being part of my bump squad and getting me close to almost to hold my baby boys in a couple weeks.
I just, how things have changed in a period of two years. It’s unbelievable. It’s incredible. Love, isn’t Lucy great? She is absolutely fantastic, and I really hope you were inspired by her story. She demonstrates that you can learn to think like a success, and therefore become a success on your fertility journey.
If you want to learn what Dr. Lucy learned, That is available to you. My Fearlessly Fertile program is open, and we are conducting interviews to be part of that program now. I teach a methodology that has helped women all over the world make their mama dreams come true. If you want to be part of that, go to www.FromMaybeToBaby.com and request your breakthrough session there.
This is your chance, my darling, to truly cover your bases, mind and body, to become the mom you know you were meant to be. Till next time. Change your mindset, change your results. Love this episode of the Fearlessly Fertile podcast? Subscribe now and leave an awesome review.
Remember, the desire in your heart to be a mom is there because it was meant for you. When it comes to your dreams, keep saying hell yes.