EP9: Agonizing over age? Here’s a smarter approach.

Whether you are North, or just slightly South of 40, the insane pressure to cross the baby-making finish line in the face of being labeled “geriatric,” or of “Advanced Maternal Age” is real. Feel like a spring chicken with this smarter approach to the fertility age game.

Hey gorgeous. If you want success on your fertility journey, you’ve got to have the mindset for it. It’s time to kick fear, negativity, doubt, shame, jealousy and the whole clown car of low vibe fertility journey BS to the curb. I’m your host, Roseanne Austin, fertility mindset master, former prosecutor and recovering type A control freak perfectionist.

I use the power of mindset to get pregnant naturally and have my baby boy at 43 despite years of fertility treatment failure. I help women across the globe beat the. Odds on their fertility journey just like I did. Get ready for a quick hit of confidence, joy, feminine badassery, and loads of hell Yes.

For your fertility journey. It’s time to get fearless, baby fearlessly fertile. Let’s do this. Welcome to the Fearlessly Fertile Podcast, episode nine. Agonizing Over Age. Here’s a Smarter Approach. Whether you are North or just slightly South of 40, the insane pressure to cross the baby making finish line in the face of being labeled geriatric or of advanced maternal age is real.

I felt it. I know you feel it. And for some reason, society in general has bought into the idea that becoming a mom in your 40s is an unquestionably uphill battle and you are quote unquote lucky if it happens. When people hear about your plans to have a baby in your 40s, they kind of recoil and have that sort of good luck with that look on their faces.

I remember being told I needed donor eggs at the ripe old age of 37 for no other reason but being 37. All of this is total fucking bullshit. The real truth is that women having babies at 40 or better is fucking normal. It’s not a freak show sideshow. In fact, women having babies in their 40s is more and more common.

with the assistance of treatment, or conceiving naturally. Sisters are doing it in their 40s on the regular, but that’s not getting a ton of play out there in the world. In fact, in 2017, the U. S. CDC reported that the birth rate in the United States had fallen for all age groups EXCEPT women over 40.

Births for women 40 to 44 were on the rise, and for those over 45, that shit was actually holding steady. This, my darling, is why you’ve got to take a smarter approach than just listening to conventional wisdom. Far too often, conventional wisdom is narrow minded, unimaginative, based in fear, and beholden to the tyranny of precedent.

You’ve got to be smarter than that. You’ve got to curate your own set of beliefs about time and your age. That doesn’t mean you have to live in a place of idiotic Pollyanna denial. To say that a 20 year old and a 45 year old are situated in the exact same place on the fertility spectrum would be ridiculous.

That is not what I’m talking about. We as intelligent individuals have the power to decide what the facts that present themselves in our lives actually mean. We decide. Will age be a nail in the coffin to your dreams of being a mom, or an avenue for delightful resourcefulness? You, precious one, will be the most qualified arbiter of any such fact.

This is the perfect time to point out the real real when it comes to statistics. Because when you are at, near, or over 40, you are probably getting hammered on all sides with them. And just as a side note, there’s a part of me that suspects some experts use statistics as excuses for their lack of resourcefulness and creativity.

Maybe that’s something you might want to think about. Here’s a smarter approach to statistics. Statistics are just information. That’s all they are, love. They are simply information. They are not a verdict. Rarely do statistics take into account the loads and absolute treasure trove of anecdotal evidence that women over 40 are having babies all the frickin time.

Right now at this moment while you’re listening to this podcast That is a fact on a planet of over 7 billion people You can be certain that there are women all over the planet in Labor and delivery rooms having babies and they are well into their 40s That’s real. The statistics are simply a snapshot of a given set of circumstances.

They are simply information, doll. They are not a verdict unless you make them so. If you are agonizing about your age, the bottom line is you’ve got to turn that shit around and use your precious time and resources to cultivate a success oriented mindset on this journey. You simply can’t afford not to.

When everyone is shuddering as they look at your birth date, you’ve got to be the one motherfucker in the room that is confident as shit that your baby is on the way and this is going to happen. Your mindset is the foundation of your journey, my love. It shapes your experience and ultimately plays out in your body.

It impacts your health, well being, sleep patterns, hormone levels, stress levels, treatment choices, and relationships. All of which can impact your results, right? When you are trying to pull a Hail Mary with only a few seconds left on the clock, you need to have all of that shit tight and right. This is a decision about what thoughts and beliefs you are consciously choosing as you move through this chapter in your life.

When you treat mindset like a nice to have or as a low priority, you fall prey to fear, negativity, beating yourself up, doubt, jealousy, helplessness, freak out over pregnancy announcements, and baby pictures in your social media feed. Those are all pointless distractions that are doing nothing to propel you toward your goal of being a mom, and unchecked can actually put your goal in jeopardy.

This is why having a bulletproof mindset is particularly important when you’re trying to conceive at this stage in your life. You’re going to have a barrage of opinions headed your way. You’re going to encounter doubters, naysayers, worrywarts, dubious looks, scary statistics, as I mentioned before, harsh judgment, and super black and white ultimatums.

My love, you’ve got to know who you are and who you intend to be in this process in order to navigate all of that nonsense effectively and keep your dreams and desires at the forefront. A success oriented mindset means that you will have the ability to make the best decisions possible for yourself that are in alignment with what you value and what you desire to accomplish.

And think about it, mama, haven’t you earned that right? As a woman who is near, at, or well into her 40s, This is your life. You own this. You have earned the right to sit in the captain’s seat on your fertility journey, love. So let’s take a moment to really celebrate that, because I think that’s something that we forget.

Think about the reasons you waited until now to become a mom. Maybe you held off because there were some career goals you wanted to accomplish. Maybe you were holding out for some financial stability. Maybe you had the Ridiculous audacity to hold out for the right partner. Maybe you were looking for the right father for your baby.

Imagine that. That is some awesome and responsible shit right there. Too often we beat ourselves up for these things, but think about what a kick ass mom you are being. By having waited. Somewhere in your heart, you love this baby so much that you didn’t just hook up with your high school loser boyfriend or some creep that didn’t give a shit about you.

Mama, you held out because you wanted to have some things in place so you could give this child and yourself a great life. Let that really sink in for a moment. Just look at what a killer mom you are already, and your baby isn’t even here. Own your shit, mama. Own your path. Quit beating yourself up. You are doing great.

There is absolutely no reason to agonize about your age, doll. You just have to get smart about it. Toss the age bullshit out the window. When you think about your age, the only thing I want to hear from you is Spring chicken, baby. I am a spring chicken. That’s the challenge, okay? When you start agonizing about your age, I want you to immediately remember me saying to you, Spring chicken, baby!

There is undoubtedly a woman in the world, right now, who has given birth at an age that is older than you are today. So let that fact inspire you. Bring chicken, baby. If you want to learn more about me, my coaching practice, my online courses that are changing the lives of women across the globe, or read my amazing client success stories, check me out at www.

frommaybetobaby. com or see what I’m up to on Instagram at RosanneAustinFertility. Till next time, change your mindset, change your results. Love this episode of the Fearlessly Fertile podcast? Subscribe now and leave an awesome review. Remember, the desire in your heart to be a mom is there because it was meant for you.

When it comes to your dreams, keep saying hell yes.

Rosanne offers a variety of programs to help you on your fertility journey — from Self-study, to Live, to Private Coaching.